I really like this! Very dark but enjoyable.
April 12th, 2019 at 03:38pm
This poem is quite sorrowful, and as usual you convey exactly what you mean to and no less. I like how in the line and boys cry / for their mothers you do refer to them as boys -- they are young, and scared and need support from their parent(s) even if they are killing and participating in war, quite an adult thing to do.
Stylistically, (personally) I think that the piece could benefit from some punctuation (mainly commas) just to break up the lines a bit -- they're seeming to run on at the moment, but they still work so.
Thank you for submitting this poem, I quite enjoyed it!