Apparition. - Comments

That was really good, I agree with Deceptive Cadence about the "God Somebody Save Her" line being repeated the whole thing was just really well done.

(my name is sarah and I'm on my frirnds mibba) BUT- this poem was awesome.

I normally hate stereotypical, dark, gory, "emo," poems, and dismiss them as cliche.
I read the first line of this and almost clicked the back button on my browser, BUT then I read the next few stanzas.

There was something really beautiful about it. Just so raw and desperate. Your line breaks and simple words are so effective. And the repeat of "God somebody save her" is so haunting.

Keep up the good work.

wow. that's really good. and strong. nice.