I like it, but it seems a bit too repeated.
The concept is amazing and its a good topic to write poems on.
A good tip if you didnt already know: Don't try writing the poem, let the poem flow from your thoughts and feelings to the paper or computer through your fingers. You'll find the best, raw material that way. And then if you wanna tone it up you could edit it.
Just a thought from a fellow poet:)
Keep it up, maybe youll come out with something amazing:)
The concept is amazing and its a good topic to write poems on.
A good tip if you didnt already know: Don't try writing the poem, let the poem flow from your thoughts and feelings to the paper or computer through your fingers. You'll find the best, raw material that way. And then if you wanna tone it up you could edit it.
Just a thought from a fellow poet:)
Keep it up, maybe youll come out with something amazing:)