Suicide Season - Comments

That took me by surprise haha.

Still loving this, update soon xx

Okay so one of the few good Arctic Monkeys songs was the title lyric. Which could only mean good things from the chapter! (:

I loved the others all wondering what was going on. All of them are really out of the loop and are very unknowing as to what's going on between Oli and Jez. I like that you've kept them all in the dark, it adds a touch of mystery, and it keeps Oli and Jez isolated, like they can only discuss it with each other, or with themselves mentally. their eyes glazed over whilst their minds were awake with thoughts chasing each other around their brains. I loveee that line, they are chasing each other, they just don't seem to realise it.

I liked how Jez's mood was lifted at the thought of going home. She seemed to become chipper really quickly, as if something snapped inside her and she just decided that the best way to get through it was to grin and bear it. The thought of home and Alex fuelled it all, which makes me feel a bit sorry for Oli, especially at the end when it's bombs away and he drops his confession of undying love. Like the reason Jez was happy, was thinking of seeing Alex again, and you have to feel sympathy for Oli, because it's not him that makes her happy.

DITCH TURNER JEZ. He's overrated and shizz. (:

But yes, wonderful update.

Ohhhhh boy, I don't see that ending well. :/ He just couldn't keep his mouth shut.

Oh dear. Guess who popped into my head when the words "Matt Davies" appeared? :shifty I tried to make him into TBO Matt but it didn't work so whatever, Matty decided to go and pay BMTH for reasons unknown :hand:

I like how he's sandwiched between the pair of them, it's like he's the barrier between them. That's really clever and it shows how much your writing has come along. Jez and Oli are far too stubborn to speak, and Matt's like the man inbetween them, if that makes sense.

I think the tour seems to be dragging for everybody - The tour had stopped in another grey and overwhelming city - I think they're all a bit tired of being on the road and in one another's company, and they're just oblivious to where they are. They're just in another city, they don't seem to care and all the cities seem to be the same.

I liked Matt's exagerrated stage whisper. He wants them to know that he knows something is wrong, in an attempt to try and patch things up between them. But he doesn't really get much information and he just sits back resignedly between Jez and Oli.

I liked the humour that Gavin (WHY DO ALL OF TBO HAVE THE SAME NAMES AS MEMBERS OF FFAF? :finger: :finger: :finger: :lmfao) brought to the story. Like how Jez steals a hoodie, and Gav mocks her, but then reveals that he didn't exactly pay for his hoodie either. That really amused me, and I liked the friendliness between the pair of them. They seem really at ease with one another and I think this is just what Jez needed - somebody to have a bit of a laugh with.

And Oli's confession at the end! :omfg: Things are getting interesting! Can't wait to see what happens next :tehe:

Wow I just found this story and I love it.
And I'm actually finding myself liking Alex after this one. Huh....

An update would be awesome (:

Pfft, this was really good. :hand:

I liked how it was Jez that found the way to a farmhouse, rather than Oli. It shows that Oli isn't as clever with directions as he likes to think he is, and he actually relies on Jez for a lot more than he thinks. I like that.

Things suddenly get awkward between Jez and Oli. I think they're both headstrong characters, and neither of them want to give into the other. They'd rather just ignore each other, rather than back down.

Jez's anger...wow, I saw that coming. She's had all this rage bottled up inside her and suddenly it all pours out because she can't cope any more. Like, Curtis tries to calm her down but she's not having any of it. She just wants to rant because nobody seems to listen to her. They hear, but they don't listen.

When she explained to Oli about the whole ED business, I think this is the first part of the story that he feels honestly guilty, because he knows that it's partly his fault.

Alex is an absolute sweetheart, cancelling the tour for her, and Oli just scoffs and laughs. That's one thing I really don't like about him, his cockiness is absolutely terrible. But then Jez goes into more detail and makes him feel worse.

I'm looking forward to the next update. :cute:

Oli Sykes, you grade 'A' arsehole. He's still better than Alex though. (:

I liked the whole Jez storming out of the bus and taking the chocolate mousse with her. It almost sounded as though she was giving up on them, by not fighting back and isolating herself.

I also liked how her eating disorder wasn't fuelled by something that's been done to death, like being abused or bullied, it was all about control. I always find your writing refreshing in the sense that you don't use cliches and situations you see in every other story, it makes everything that bit more original, which is hard to achieve these days.

But yeah, Oli's an idiot. I kind of want Jez to find out about the call, but at the same time I don't.

I know wherever you decide to take this, it'll turn out amazing.

I've missed this story. Update was fantastic, just like I knew it would be. Nice work!

I really like this. You're an amazing writer. Ever story I've read from you, is a piece of fucking wonder.

Serious.

Update this, yeah? &&I'd love if you did another William Beckett one -cuepuppyfacepls-

I love your updates. Poor Jez :c

I'm torn between Alex and Oli!

...but Oli was out of order on calling him "boring".

Eagerly awaiting the next chapter...!

I love thisss!
Still voting for Alex, though :D

Pfft, you know that I don't like Oli. :tehe: He's not very considerate about Jez and her feelings, he seems like he's just contained in this bubble and himself and doesn't notice a lot of things in the outside world. He only seems to be bothered about things that concern him. :think:

Oli doesn't want to admit he's lost. I think it's pride, over anything else, that stops him admitting this to Jez. But even she knows that they're lost.

And the fact that he's uncomfortable in his jeans shows just how much he didn't listen, because in the previous part, he was warned and he didn't listen. It proves my point about Oli not caring.

But he does care a little, because he sits down with Jez when she wants to stop for a while. But then he tactlessly asks her if she's happy with Alex, and she is so quick to defend him. She has hostility in her eyes and instantly asks Oli what type of question it was, because she's just so annoyed at him. She's been with Alex for two years so obviously he's doing something right.

I absolutely hate how Oli called Alex boring. Makes me want to punch the bugger. He had no right to say that, especially to Alex's girlfriend.

I loved how Jez finally admitted the truth - I always made sure I was there for you to make you realize how little you were there for me - I think that he never knew how much he hurt her until she admitted that. It shows his lack of understanding and empathy. He's really quite a flawed character, a definite opposite to Alex which I like.

And all hell seems to break loose, she finally seems to let go of all these angry feelings that she had bottled up inside herself about him.

I loved how you ended it on a question.

Very well done indeed. Loved this update. :arms:

I love this story.

I love how each person has that little inner battle and they don't know how to tell the other person or react to things.
It makes it very believable.

I can't wait for the next chapter.

I love this.
:)
More please.

I love Jez. She's totally a character that people (including me :cute:) can relate to. I love how she'd finally had enough of Oli and totally ruined his moment of being kind of nice to her :XD
(I'm awful at feedback)

OLI > ALEX.
I don't like either of their bands, but thats just how I feel...

Anyway, I've said it before, but I'll say it again, I really do think your good at creating tension, and writing conflict and arguments. You use really powerful words and have a way of wanting us to take a side with whoever we believe is in the right, in this part, I would take Jez's side. At the same time, I feel sorry for Oli, cause it's obvious he wants to tell her, but he wants her to guess. Almost as if he can't string the right sentence together and get it all out of his system.

The contrast between Alex and Oli has become more apparent, now it has come from Jez's mouth. Like Alex is the safe one and Oli is the more dangerous one, who is more likely to break your heart. It seems to me that she is with Alex because of that sense of safety and security, which makes a lot of sense and just adds to her overall character.

I like how they got lost too. It gave them time to actually have the argument, with no witnesses around to back either of them up. It was a personal, private argument, but there was still a tense atmosphere.

Wonderful update, Nina.

aww, i feel bad for oli! i mean, i feel bad for jez too. idk who to feel worse for, really.
but i do know that i'm curious to find out what happened while jez had that eating disorder.

I just started reading this,
and it's amazing.
Its original and I love it. :D

Gosh, Nina, you're updating loads recently and I'm finding it so hard to find time to leave you feedback for it! :tehe: You're really on a roll, here!

I think this was a slower part in my opinion, but I still liked it. It just seemed a little slow-going, what with describing what Jez wore and stuff.

It was still really good though, I want to stress. :arms: And it was really useful to the story.

I love how BMTH and TBO are having an argument. :tehe: It just seems like the thing that they'd do. :XD

e hated having to cancel gigs, it always felt to him like he was letting the fans down, and goodness knows he was an expert at letting people down. This line is so sad, I feel for Oli in a strange way, because he knows that sometimes he can be a bit of a failure but he can acknowledge his flaws, which is good.

And Jez and Oli are off together! Eek, that can't be good. :think:

Sorry this feedback wasn't more substantial. I'll blame the fact that I'm hyped. :lmfao

so. effing. good.
i have a feeling the next chapter is going to be VERY interesting. :D