I read the first chapter. I could connect with the character. A friend and I had a huge fight over a guy but we are friends again and I am really close to the guy even though he is dating a different good friend; so I can connect. Anyways, I like the story but you may want to start it with something better than one day or one time...that can be a little boring. When you write maybe you should add a prolouge. "I couldn't believe it. Everything seeemed to be going wrong. Couldn't he see the signs? I was practaticly in love with him, but-no- that wasn't good enough. He had to go and do...that..." Just do a breif paragraph that pulls the reader in but doesn't spoil any suprises in your story. Notice how I use no names and you won't know what he did to me unless you continue reading?
January 4th, 2010 at 11:48pm
Spelling wasn't that bad even without Diane!