Wish - Comments

First off, sorry it took me so long to comment this! Really, really am sorry!!

Anyways,

First thing I noticed about this was the layout. I don’t usually comment on the layout, because… I really see no need most of the time, but it was fabulous and tranquil and went with the picture and as soon as I saw the layout I knew it would be a pleasure to read. Do you ever get that, know a story’s going to be good by a fabulous layout? Maybe I’m just strange, but oh well.

The picture you chose was gorgeous, and I felt you made a fabulous story out of it.

It was so sweet how they came about meeting each other, having fun and just being young. When you’re young it’s so easy to make friends, with anyone, and this seems like the perfect example of that. And how they have their “escape”. How no one understood, not even them, just added to the childhood innocence.

We just knew that it was the one word that meant it was justified to go to the field and talk until the streetlights came on and we had to go home.
This just seems to capture the ideal of the summer I think many people which they could have, but very little have been fortunate to experience.

It’s almost heartbreaking when she knows she loves him, but can’t do anything due to friendship, how they do the simplest things together like talk, and run through the field, yet it makes her so happy. I love how she remembers the things he told him, about the sunset and the wishes, it shows how much he stuck in her memory, and makes you wonder how much she stuck in his.

How she believed she could see the wishes, that the wishes would come true, in amongst the flying seeds, in that field. And how she makes such childish wishes because she lacks the knowledge of what to come, ponies and friendship forever, and the certainty that next summer she’d be able to do it all again. Absolutely gorgeous.

It’s also heartbreaking how she’s the one that seems to grow up, all whilst she’s changing and visiting the field less and less he’s still there with his wishes, still believing it seems, where hers are half-hearted. Then the truly adult, Logic comes in, and she moves away. How the place the she used to love just turns into a bunch of weeds, but it seems like it still sticks in her mind as she ends up dancing like she ran, amongst a paper substitute of what she used to have.

When she comes back, and sees the field for what it was probably, as just a field, and see’s him, it’s like only her being their had kept him young, in the few years she’d been gone he’d also realised he’d needed to grow up.

“Wishes. Do you still make ’em? Or did you stop when you left?”
He seems so hurt! But like he’s hiding it with bravado, trying to casually approach the topic as if he doesn’t care, wanting to remind her of it, but running away himself before he remembers too much.

I think my favourite bit of this was when he’s walking away before she even opens her eyes. It’s like he’s leaving her just the way he feels she left him, alone in a field full of wishes which don’t come true. I would just love to know what he’s thinking and his part of the story as such.

So yes, I loved this, obviously, I thought it was absolutely adorable and heartbreaking at the same time, and I’m a sucker for growing up and apart stories. It’s so real, and it happens, even though you wish it wouldn’t.

Well done, I’m going to have to check out some of your other stuff now. The comment for your other story shall be along shortly. xx

Good. Can't be silly and go on with all those adjectives. This was good, and I can tell you know it. Keep up the good work.

wow this was beautiful,
and sad.
I love those little flower things.
I always blow on them.
:)

Oooh I love this! It's beautiful! Well done!

This is truly amazing
Honest to God, it is.
It's beautiful and makes my heart flutter.
Wishes aren't for children - they're for the people with a young heart and a younger mind :)

Thank you for linking me to this
It's really cheered me up :)

This is amazing, is that it?