June 3rd, 2009 at 11:11pm
That was... so, so good!
Seriously. That's the first original oneshot I've read in forever that I loved so much. The storyline and the setting and the description all just combined to make it one fantastic story.
I particularly liked the description:
My daddy who had shown nothing but love and devotion to his daughter was going to be locked away forever. Like a princess in a tower.
I thought the use of the fairy-tale style imagery was really powerful, because it helped to remind the reader that the main character was a child- it showed how this scene would be seen through a child's eyes. That's important, because it keeps another dimension of charm in the story- it's a lot more interesting than it might be through an adult's eyes.
Gracey's whole story was kind of heartbreaking, what with her mum leaving and then she and her dad really struggling... and then, obviously eventually they ended up smashed to pieces. :/
It also made me feel it was all connected back to that lyric straighten up little soldier. Because Gracey obviously had to be strong and stand up and live through everything... her dad asked her to lie to the police for him, just a tiny little kid. She was his little soldier.
The twist suprised me, too. I wasn't expecting it... I don't know what I was expecting, but I really liked it, either way. :XD
I can't decide if it's cool she followed in his footsteps or a shame. I think technically it's probably a shame, but I think it's kind of cool. :tehe: :XD
This was a brilliant oneshot/songfic.
"This was the one item that hadn't been taken away. This was what my dad buried into my hand as he kissed my cheek before being marched to the car with the flashing lights on top. He promised me everything was going to be okay. He promised I was going to be safe and promised that he would be back."
"That night I didn't cry. I watched him be driven away with his hands in metal loops and his head ducked down. That night daddy did cry. They knew he never meant to hurt anyone, but that wasn't the point of law and justice, was it?"
A fabulous description of how bittersweet the world seems to be for her. A good foreshadowing of her own life in crime.
"Daddy would be proud."
I find this end ironic, because in all fairness this father could be very remorseful and want his daughter to have nothing to do with this kind of life. But in her eyes, she thinks this is the only way to live.
I was intrguied because this song almost always brings me to tears. And you've have not only done it justice but given it a sense of vindication. Yay!