January 6th, 2011 at 01:55am
Too Young For This - Comments
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Im begging you to update this. Please please pleaseOctober 11th, 2010 at 07:10am
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Pleeaasseee upload soon, trust me know cares about reading for hours.we'd love it!October 7th, 2010 at 05:25am
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Okay not even three chapters in and I am beyond pissedOctober 7th, 2010 at 05:19am
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I mean the.. New idea.. lolOctober 7th, 2010 at 04:31am
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Oh! I like it! :DOctober 7th, 2010 at 04:31am
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Started reading, and luv it, its great keep writing and i'll keep on reading, check out My Life Has To End, thnxSeptember 8th, 2010 at 10:35pm
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You write your characters so brilliantly, for every single one, I can identify them with someone I know in real life.
The description was great--it was just so nice to read, it flowed well.
<3July 11th, 2010 at 10:59am -
Hahahha. Poor dude. . having to by tampons.
I just read chap. one, but I'm going back when I have more time. <3
I really like it so far, I can't wait to finish it. :DJuly 10th, 2010 at 07:10pm -
I really liked this so far, I'm only on the first chapter, but it's really great! ^^July 10th, 2010 at 06:59pm
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Miya sounds really pretty ^-^
And lol, chapter one was crazy.July 8th, 2010 at 10:58pm -
You have some grammar errors in there, but I love this!
The description is phenomenol and your characters are very vivid:D
~Free comment:)July 7th, 2010 at 07:48pm -
Oh...this is the prequel to Everybody Hates Jacob? Should I be reading this one instead.
/facepalm.
lol. Anywho, you know that I love the way you write.
And seriously, it's wonderful,
I will like to hump you.July 7th, 2010 at 07:35pm -
I think I started to read this once, and I don't know why I never finished it. This is really good!July 6th, 2010 at 09:43pm
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Oh my goodness! Miya had the baby!!! I cant believe it! And At the end of the chapter with the "Pratice makes perfect sense." I was listening to the song the whole chapter. Well I'm about to read the Jacob story now!June 16th, 2010 at 10:10pm
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Aww, it finished!!
Haha, I loved it!!
Damn plagiarism.
I'll keep an eye out!!June 16th, 2010 at 05:56pm -
I love this story!! Such a good ending, too. Now I'm gonna go check out the sequel.June 16th, 2010 at 08:30am
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Her birth didn't seem that at all painful...lucky!!
Haha!!
I love this, that was funny too!!June 15th, 2010 at 08:41pm -
DUDE!!
Her waters broke!! That's damn...damn very bad!!
But well done Danny...I think that's his name....for behaving!!
But oh shit...well..I can't wait til the next chapter.June 14th, 2010 at 09:39pm -
I can't believe she's going to have the baby!! And Danny Boy behaved at his birthday party!! Also Matt's brother is an assmonkey.June 14th, 2010 at 05:23am
This story was very well written. I could see the main conflicts, and you simply got to the point. Everything that Daniel said or did had a meaning behind it. Daniel's character never changed in the first three chapters, and you made it very clear on how immature he was. All of the characters were well developed in the first three chapters.
I would like to point out a few grammatical errors here or there, but you said you have a Beta for the rest of the story. It was just minor ones such as punctuation, so it wasn't that big of a deal. You used good adjectives to describe a character. I could imagine every character perfectly with how you described them.
Another point I would like to make is the difference between chapters one and two. The first chapter you talked about Daniel's quest to get tampons, but then in the next chapter Maiya was pregnant. I saw the connection there between the two but I just did not get the time frame this was happening in at first. I had thought the night they were playing manopoly and the day Maiya had told him she was pregnant were close together instead of a few weeks to a month apart. Besides the small confusion I had between the two chapters, the rest of the plot seemed very well written and had a purpose.