Except for the many grammar errors, this was pretty good. It was a nice idea, I don't think that you developed it to it's full potential though. I think it could've been much more raw and real. However, like I said, it's a really great idea and you've did a good job with it.
It was a nice idea, I don't think that you developed it to it's full potential though. I think it could've been much more raw and real. However, like I said, it's a really great idea and you've did a good job with it.