I love it. Ah-mazing job :] I think that I love this better than any of your other stories. Wonderful
October 27th, 2009 at 01:27am
I'm gonna start off this comment by saying wow! Despite the fact that you're 13, you pulled off the content and the tone of the story very maturely. Had you ever heard the song before? I love it, it's one of my faves.
Anyway, so I LOVED this story. It was written very well and I really like the format in which you chose to write it; starting with the first time Haley and Max met, and then with all the major milestones in their lives, such as their first kiss, the day they began dating, etc..
I also liked that you included the elderly Haley and Max incorporated into the story and discussing parts of the book as the story was going along.
And the book! Oh my God, when the scrap book was revealed to be 'Haley and Max's Book of Love' I was all :cheese:. Haha, I really liked that that was what you chose to name the book, it was a nice touch. I like how in that way you incorporated the song into the story instead of the actual song lyrics because I hate that kind of thing in songfics.
The character's of Haley and Max were written well and I literally almost cried at the end where you were describing them looking at each other during the wedding. I'm serious...I nearly CRIED, it was that good, haha.
I also liked how you ended each milestone with what date it occurred, it was a very nice effect.
All in all, I very much enjoyed this story! I didn't notice any spelling or punctuation errors whatsoever. There were some parts of the story I noticed could be described or written a little better, but you're only young so you'll learn from those mistakes.
So far this story is my favourite out of the entries I've read and I think it'll be hard to beat. The winners will be announced soon. ^^
