Frei Im Freien Fall - Comments

I like this!! :D
Update soon please

Finally! A update, I though I was gonna have to hunt you down.
Please update sooner.
And I don't want Bill and Lyric to be torn apart so soon.

Awww :3
I could seriously see the scene with Bill and me. So sweet.
lololol. I'll probably end up going through 20 name changes before I'm even 20 years old.
I'm sorry for that xD

I really like this new one.

I like the way Kaulitz. comments!
And I absolutely love this! When you gonna put me in a story?!(lol kidding!)
Poor Bill, und Savi. I wonder how long it's gonna be before anyone can find theom or they go back.
Well update soon please!!

Awww, I like this story. It's cute where it's going. Poor Bill. Aw @ Savi. And Simone did care, she just didn't care that she cared... if that makes sense.

And Tommyyyyyy... I still love you :D

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He then, picked Savannah’s small frame up in his arms and carried her bridal style. Savannah kicked and struggled, but gave up after an hour. She knew that Bill wouldn’t give up and put her down.

The only thing I don't like about this sentence is that I probably wouldn't be kicking and struggling for an hour xD Maybe like twenty seconds or something but an hour is pretty damn long. It's allll about perspective. But otherwise this was a cute couple sentences x3 The idea of Bill carrying me like that is like...defispgrsgjsfglsengps. So sweet x3 I imagine if he ever does that to be a sadist, I'd just lean my face into his neck and smile because it would be so adorable x3

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Savannah came into the back bedroom and collapsed on the bed. Bill watched her as she curled up and fell asleep. He covered her up with a blanked and lifted her head and put a pillow underneath. Then, he went to the couch with his own blanket and went to sleep.

Nein, Bill, stay and sleep with me ;-; But yeah, the back rooms of RVs are always epic. I just love RVs in general. We had this one at a play in August and during intermission we stayed in it and talked and shizz. It seriously was almost nicer than a tour bus, if you can believe that. I just like the idea of a moving house xD Except for when you're in the bathroom, then you hit a pothole and you go flying off the toilet xDDD

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Instead, she was trying to figure out a way to surprise her son with the digital studio that her husband had bought for him. He wanted for Bill to use his voice with Tom's guitar to make music.

That was just a sweet sentence. I love how you put that, for some reason. It was such a simple sentence but it made something happen inside of me, it really stressed somehow how important that music is to the twins. I don't even know why, but it did.

I like this so far. I want to see what happens with Bill and me xD And when I find out about Tom and everything. And if you want, I'll make a layout for the story, it only takes me about twenty minutes to do a good layout [like the one for Necromancy was made in ten minutes :P]. I did Aislinn's for The Chosen too :P

And haha @ Liz. I probably would say that xD

Nice update, hun.
It's funny because I can imagine Savi saying:

Savi:

“I don’t know. Nor do I care. My mom hates me, and I am glad to be out of that damn house.” She said.

:(

I thought it was cute how she ended up waiting for him (even if she was a jerk xD)

Like Savi said, I liked the ending too. You added the song/ story title in the perfect place.
[/fail wording] but I'm sure you know what I mean :P

And the name change? It suits the story much better, nice job :D
Um, I'm not sure if you know this or not, but the picture for your layout doesn't work... =/

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Bill walked to the refrigerator and grabbed the orange juice.

Nein, I canNOT date a boy who drinks orange juice.

...jk, jk.

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a girl, a little younger than him. She had short, dirty brown hair, and her clothes were torn. She looked up at him to reveal a face of an angel.

Face of an angel? Awww, ich bin eine Engel? x3

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“Savannah . Savi, for short.” She replied, not taking Bill’s hand.

Aw, I'm such a jerk to him xD

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Savi nodded. “Yeah. I just got thrown out of my house.”

How did you know I've been kicked out of my house more than twice ._.

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Bill ran back to the park to find Savannah waiting for him where he had left her. He smiled at her as they walked off into the woods together.

*is smiling pretty big right now*
This is so sweet x3

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Bill had never felt so…alive. He was free to be his own person. No rules. No parents. No Tom. Bill was finally as he called it :Frei Im freien fall.

Free in a free fall.

I like the ending of that. It's the perfect song for this chapter. Being, like, free and shit. *fail comment* It's good imagery, anyway x3

I like where the story is going... plz update soon!

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Tom didn't have the common curtsey to use a pair of head phones.

'Curtsey' should be 'courtesy' :]

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His walls were littered with various band posters and old photos of he and his brother, taken during a time of pure bliss. His floor was covered with dirty clothes and school books that he didn't care about.

Bill's so messy xD

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Bill walked to his dress

Should be 'dresser' :]

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No one was going to notice him while Tom was practicing that damn instrument. His own mother ignored him! Bill hated it, but he was slowly getting used to it.

Aw ;-; Poor Bill. I understand how he feels because the same thing happens with my cheerleader sister, and guess what writing, singing scene girl gets ignored? -.-; Yup, me.

The ending was a bit abrupt and choppy and the chapter should definitely be longer (at least a page in MS Word) but otherwise it's off to a good start. I can't wait to see how you write me xD

And good news, this is the fourth fic with a me/Bill pairing >:]

xD

Poor Bill. I know how it feels to have other siblings be the center of attention >.>
Good so far, I like it.
Can't wait for more!
*subscribes*

I like it! :D
I reallly like where this is sounding lke it's going to go.
[and from what you've told me, it's going to be really good. :D]
I can't wait for the rest of the characters to be introduced and to read more. :]
Update soon I hope. :]

This was vary good :)
i can see a brother filling this way at some point

This was vary good :)
i can see a brother filling this way at some point

Try to write a meaningful comment!