Promised you I'd leave feedback eventually. Sorry I'm such a failure for leaving speedy feedback.
I think this is one of my favourite pieces of yours. I like how it all comes together in the end, I wasn't expecting it to end in the way it did, but I'm glad it turned out okay.
At the start, it was interesting how it was revealed that Toshiya was wearing Die's leather jacket - it showed that subconsciously, Toshiya is still close to Die. I know he left in a rush, not caring what he'd put on, but I'd like to think that he subconsciously chose this jacket because deep down, he will love Die no matter what. And this jacket is there to remind him of what he has, even though he's not always happy with him. Also, despite what the man says to Toshiya, his thoughts always return to Die. Even though he scolds himself for thinking about him.
I liked how the phone call brought Toshiya back to reality. Yeah, he could go off with that guy that he just met, but does he really want to? As soon as he heard Die's voice, it was as if he'd forgiven him for their argument which had happened earlier. He knows that he could never cheat on Die, not really. It's really sweet, and shows that your relationship doesn't necessarily have to be perfect in order for you to love one another.
Oh, and by the way -the reminiscence about Die cooking was really cute and I loved how it's a fond memory for Toshiya. Sometimes the simple things in life are the best things.
This was a nice touch. He made his way back home, the lights looking brighter than they did before. It's funny how anger can warp your perception of things, isn't it? I'm glad you wrote this little bit in because it just made the story more believable and I felt I could really empathise with him. There's been so many times where I've just flown off the hook and everything seems so fucking worse when you're angry. And then when you calm down, everything seems so much nicer. So yeah, rambling aside, it was good to put that little bit in. :)
Toshiya's apology to Die was just so... He knows that he's in the wrong and that a simple "sorry" wouldn't really help anyone, so just by saying let's not fight anymore shows that he knows that their relationship has flaws, but he just desperately wants to work on it and stop all the arguments because it's tearing them apart. The ending was just right, too. Yesterday, he had hated Die but, today, he loved him. It just summed everything up and I'd like to think that they end up okay in the end; still having a couple of little arguments but always sticking together.
Sorry for the wait, and sorry for the kinda lame feedback.
I think this is one of my favourite pieces of yours. I like how it all comes together in the end, I wasn't expecting it to end in the way it did, but I'm glad it turned out okay.
At the start, it was interesting how it was revealed that Toshiya was wearing Die's leather jacket - it showed that subconsciously, Toshiya is still close to Die. I know he left in a rush, not caring what he'd put on, but I'd like to think that he subconsciously chose this jacket because deep down, he will love Die no matter what. And this jacket is there to remind him of what he has, even though he's not always happy with him. Also, despite what the man says to Toshiya, his thoughts always return to Die. Even though he scolds himself for thinking about him.
I liked how the phone call brought Toshiya back to reality. Yeah, he could go off with that guy that he just met, but does he really want to? As soon as he heard Die's voice, it was as if he'd forgiven him for their argument which had happened earlier. He knows that he could never cheat on Die, not really. It's really sweet, and shows that your relationship doesn't necessarily have to be perfect in order for you to love one another.
Oh, and by the way -the reminiscence about Die cooking was really cute and I loved how it's a fond memory for Toshiya. Sometimes the simple things in life are the best things.
This was a nice touch. He made his way back home, the lights looking brighter than they did before. It's funny how anger can warp your perception of things, isn't it? I'm glad you wrote this little bit in because it just made the story more believable and I felt I could really empathise with him. There's been so many times where I've just flown off the hook and everything seems so fucking worse when you're angry. And then when you calm down, everything seems so much nicer. So yeah, rambling aside, it was good to put that little bit in. :)
Toshiya's apology to Die was just so...
Sorry for the wait, and sorry for the kinda lame feedback.