When I Turned the Television On - Comments

read it na. from the start to....uh....the most current ^^""
sorry na...boredom.
it's nice though... xD

I like the pictures of the last few chapters :D Also, I want more chapters released per week >:D

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I'm sorry, but it's not that great.
[ constructive criticism mode, x5000 charlie ]
Firstly, it's not really reasonable and realistic. If you hadn't of told me to, I wouldn't of read past like, the second or third chapter.
Secondly, the chapters are really short and it's basically just people talking and really, only two feelings were positively conveyed the most, anger and that OH-SHIT feeling of adrenaline and fear together.
Thirdly, well, I don't aim for these. Even though I will read almost anything, this type of plot is what I thought of when I was like... 8. Seriously, it's almost identical to this one I wrote some years ago.
Fourthly, Seth's job and relationships with his boss and bodyguard are of fairytale level. It's not like that. No.
Fifthly, Michelle's attitude towards the boy when he just randomly pops up in her home is of... just plain out not real. To me, it seems like she LIKES angering her child by allowing her mortal enemy to stay in the house. And why would she even do that? :\

Well, I have to admit there were some things I liked about this. I really like how the heroine is culturally diverse. This itself is really unique and rare. I like how you added a little humor in. But not how you dragged it out and made such a big fuss over it. I like how it brought back a little bit of my little lass self, thinking back to how I thought in like... idk, six years ago?

Basically, idk. This isn't really what I read and maybe that's why I dislike it. You're still young - even though we're like... the same age :O i think - but, really, Maria, don't take me criticism to heart. Okay, eat it up. I don't lie, but you'll need to work on your writing skills. :\

Now I feel like a bitch for telling the truth.

Only 3 Chapters?!?! I want MORE per week! XD

anata no monogatari wa bitin desu, motto motto! onegai shimasu :)

Wah! Only one chapter since last week?!?! I want More! XD

SHE KNOWS!~ SHE KNOWS~! UPDATE SOON!!!!

whoa. really? *cocks head to side*

thank you! *bows*

Aww. . . :')
I actually like your story,buddy :-bd

thank youu!! XD

i'll do what i can. :3

i loooooooooouoooooouoooooooouoooooooooooooooouoooooooooooooovvvvvvvvvveeeeeeee it!!! UPDATE PLZ!

lol okay. haha.

I can see this developing into something special. Keep it up! I hope you update weekly as I really want to follow this story to the end. :D

awwwwww snap!!! how's he gonna disguise himself? will he have to wear a wig? will Alice find out? Tune in to the next chapter of "WHEN I TURNED THE TELEVISION ON" to find out! UPDATE SOOONNNNN!!!!!

i will update sooner or later :3

thank youu!!!! XD

UPDATE!!!! I COMMMAND YOUUUUUU!!!! jk i love your story!! but srsly update....and soon...

lol. haha. thank youu. :3

Hmmm... So far so good. I hope it develops into something special. Keep it up!