Running Water - Comments

Wow! this is back! The fourth chapter was pretty confusing, considering Noah just randomly found Fern. maybe that part was left out when you rewrote this.

wow Noah really is a good friend.

Gah this was amazing!!!!!!!!! <3

Well, it's not much help if Noah doesn't know where Fern is at. I'm dying to know how in the world he will find her. I also wonder where she had gone to.

I love your little cliffies at the end of your chapters ;) it keeps me wondering and waiting or more.

The bond between Noah and Fern is growing and strong and I'm glad you write it that way. Your writing is pure genius :)

I love the first line. It's simple, doesn't give away too much and if you say it in the right accent, it sounds funny.

"To describe Fern Evans in one word would be like trying to count the stars. You can try, but you know you haven’t gotten it right on."

This is really picky, but to me, it would have sounded better (aka made more sense if you think about it) if it said this:

"To describe Fern Evans in one word would be like trying to guess the amount of stars in the sky. You can try, but you know you haven’t gotten it right on."

The ending left me wondering who Noah and Fern were and what their relationship is. This is good, for readers will want to continue on.

I love the realism in their way of words. I can imagine them lounging about, the best friends I believe they are, talking in a normal manner. That is something most writers don't normally get. Dialogue is just as important as detail.

Also, their sarcasm makes this light-hearted and fun to read :)

The plotline is very original and I am subbing because I can't wait to read more :)

I remember reading this briefly a while back - and absolutely looooving it. You have such a way with words that it's crazy :] <3 But good crazy. xD Srsly, y u so awsum?! <333 And now onto the review!

Chapter 1: Your chapters are so short, but so gorgeous. Gawd, I'm so flackin' jealous of you and your gorgeous stories, people, and layouts. I'm actually going to review it by paragraph/sentence/whatever. It's easier that way :D

To describe Fern Evans in one word would be like trying to count the stars. You can try, but you know you haven’t gotten it right on. You never will. I-I can't even. This is just so beautiful. She really seems like this totally other-worldly kind of person that you want to really know and dig deeper into. I barely met her and I like her already <3

She was an enigma, an ever changing river. *death by gorgeous sentence*

She was simply Fern. She was the girl that dyed her hair often, changing it but never going to extremes like green. Most people couldn’t remember her natural color anymore. She liked to paint her nails bright, almost obnoxious colors, even though that made the uneven lengths more apparent. She only ate red candy and she held petty grudges. You can ask Sean Abbot, she hasn’t had a civil conversation with him since the third grade when he took her peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then had the nerve to say, “Thanks,” and kiss her on the cheek. I love how you describe her here; she seems like such a unique individual; sometimes, when I read your stories and really get into the characters heads, it makes me wish that they were real. They're just so real and lovely. Fern is a doll <3

She was hard to deal with but hard to stay away from. Kill me and that's it, eh, Jazzy? xD Murder via sentence! This is...awesome <3

Ask Noah Simmons, he would definitely agree. Oooh, hello, hello! :D Me likey Noah already ;D <3

Chapter 2: Okay, I was going to review this chapter paragraph, but seeing as this chapter is long, I'll just review it as it is. I absolutely love the relationship that Fern and Noah have. It's beyond adorable and I'm sitting here smiling like a loser. I also really like the fact that Fern decided to take the world in her own hands and decide what she's going to do with her life, besides being a daughter, a sister, a friend, and a student. I won't lie, though, the ending made me sort of sad. She's just...leaving everything behind :( That's just so heartbreaking to me <3

Chapter 3: I like how you switch POVs from Noah to Fern's; but most of all, I like how Noah is so dedicated to Fern, even though she'd already left. Seriously, this chapter shattered my heart apart. I really hope that he finds her :(

I'm in love, Jazzy. Nuff' said <3

AH, I read this before you started re-writing, like a year ago, and I loved it then, and I'm so glad you're re-writing it (although I didn't think it was bad or anything before!) I still love your writing style and the characters and I can't wait to see where you take this :)

This is great! ^_^

This amazing. I think I remember reading this before. Regardless, I like it so far and I'm subscribing. ;) Update soon.

Already in love :]

Aww I remember this story. I remember constantly checking on it, waiting for an update. Well, I'm glad that you've decided to rewrite it and hope that you keep it going.

Great to see this is back :)

I absolutely love the story concept and Fern. She's so different; it's refreshing. I can't wait to read the new chapters! :D

beautifully written, i've been looking for a story that's different for a while and bam... theres yours, perfection :)

I adore Fern already, haha.

She's interesting.

This is interesting.

It's lovely and so is the layout.

Good job once again, haha!

(:

such an awesome story. fern is soo stubborn-like. reminds me of alot of my buddies. and i have soo many questions. but i shall be patient and wait for the answers. :) thanx for helping me postpone my homework lol ~giggle~

So far I really like it! ^_^ Fern sounds a lot like me, actually. With the dying hair and nail painting and wanting to see the world.

I wish she would've taken her best friend though! >:O Now he has to find her. xD
I only read up to chapter three, but so far, I love it.

You had me with the prologue. :)
All I can say is it's absolutely wonderful and I can't wait to see where this goes.
Update soon, please. :)

I really like this story. I've only finished the first chapter, but I have such a huge soft spot for roadtrip/running-away stories. Your writing is lyrical and flows well, and Fern is an interesting and dynamic character. It's just a really soft, sweet story. :)

One word of advice though - watch out that your writing doesn't get over-laden with person-pronouns (like "she...she...she...").

I really love this!! Noah and Fern are really believable, and they both have great personalities. I love their relationship, and how they aren't always rainbows and sunshine, you know? It's realistic. You have a great writing style too! I'm eagerly awaiting the next chapter :)