Avarice - Comments

you're killing me here, you have to update now!!!

Oh, how I love it so. When I see the email update for this story, I actually get really fucking excited. It's definitely unique. I love that you're letting the plot completely develop, and doing this idea justice. Wouldn't expect anything less from you(:

eeeeekkk! you updated!!!! i still have some questions for you for the contest though.

“Salina finally took in her surroundings. The Captain's Quarters were drastically different than any other room she'd seen on any of her father's ships. Knowing though of course since these men were pirates, everything seemed to set them apart from anything Salina had ever known. The room was finely decorated with dark mahogany wood, so dark the smooth wood looked almost black. The cabin was much different than Salina ever would have imagined though, everything was elegantly decorated and looked extremely wealthy; for a ship that seemed to look as decayed and weathered as this ship, the captains quarters seemed to somehow not even fit in with it's surroundings.”

That’s actually quite clever. I like that. It gives the impression that maybe, because of the interior of his quarters, he isn’t all he appears; he may not be what everyone thinks he is; as evil as he’s proclaimed to be.

“"So I see you've made yourself quite at home." The captain said in a rather indifferent tone as took a seat in one of the chairs around the large meeting table. Salina stayed quiet as she stared unsurely at him through her thick lashes, she was too terrified to speak. She didn't want to stumble over her own speech, or say the wrong thing. She didn't want to be taken for a fool, she wanted to maintain as much dignity as her situation allowed.”

Implying she doesn’t want to make a fool of herself infront of him. She doesn’t want to look like an idiot because of her unprocessed feelings towards him. She quite likes him. And that’s obvious. She can’t process these emotions because she’s has the experience of a young child. She’s only ever been with Fredrick, and she doesn’t love him, she’s never really felt love – or really any kind of attraction that I can gather. Fredrick is only a friend to her.

“He'd long forgotten the cordial ways of speaking to another person,”

I thought cordial was an interesting word to use. I know you’ve written this in the 1700’s, but nowadays, cordial would give connotations of a sweet drink of juice. Which makes me think. He’s forgotten what it’s like to talk to someone like Salina, someone sweet like Salina. He’s forgotten what it’s like to talk sweetly to someone like Salina. Possibly hinting at a future truce/alliance. Maybe even relationship.

I like it.

“Gates felt just as foreign around this woman as Salina felt around him though. He was used to whores, sluts, prostitutes.”

He has an undermining respect for Salina, evident from the first chapter.

Fredrick is such a pussy. xD

ooh i like it! Can't wait to see what happens next! Syn seems totally hot in this story :D mooore sooon!!

this story is amazing! i'm in love with it already!!! *Subsribbles*

love hope you update soon

Hmm, interesting. *subscribes*

Hope theres another new chapter soon.

Yep you have got me hooked
i found it hilarious that she was so wowed by Michelle wearing pants
loved it

Awesome story! Can't wait for more

Lovethis<3

Pirates... Haven't seen to many stories like this

Eep! Siked for this story!

I'm anxious for the next update already... Haha..

Lovely darling. :)

hmm.
im intrigued :)

That wasn't a scary disclaimer or anything
it makes me want to read this story though
:D