The Pharaoh and I - Comments

Sorry about the small post in my previous comment. Here’s what I wanted to say:

Ooh, brilliant! :) I hope Michael and Zara meet again. :)
This is awesome so far. I like it.
Keep up your superneat, very awesome and phenomenally beautiful writing! :)

[font=times new roman]Ooh, brilliant! :) I hope Michael and Zara meet again. :)
This is awesome so far. I like it.
Keep up your neat, super-creative writing! :)

I like the idea of this story, and I will stick with it to see where it goes.
You have quite a few spelling mistakes and some of your sentences don't make complete sense. Even in your summary, there are errors with spelling.
You also shouldn't have links to pictures in the summary. They should go in the author's note at the end of the chapter, or you can create the characters. There is space for this if you look in the Stories section.
One last thing, although it's not against the rules to do so, it's probably best if you didn't update half a chapter. Readers don't like this and would prefer it if it was finished.
Other than that, though, I like the idea.

This is a good chapter! :) (Hope you finish it.) I can't wait for the next update. :)

Ooh, I like the idea of Michael Jackson as a Pharaoh in Egypt. (After all, his friend Eddie Murphy played a Pharaoh in the short film for the song Remember the Time, and did a fantastic job with the role as well.) Even as a Pharaoh, Michael looks great. :)

And by the way, apparently, in this fanfic, Michael’s father Joseph thinks that a woman couldn’t run Egypt in this story, but he didn’t know that Cleopatra was a powerful woman, and she did a good job in running Egypt like a well-oiled machine.

I can also see a character similar to myself in this story — as one of the women who plays the lyre for the King and Queen.

Anyway, keep up your superneat, superbly creative and very phenomenal writing.. :)