March 20th, 2010 at 11:25pm
Thank you for your entry!
I really like this. It was oh so cute.
I liked your choice in words and how realistically you described Jamia's thoughts.
The paragraph that begins "She knew everything would be okay the first time Frank held Lani right after she was born." was my favorite. It was just so sweet.The perfect "proud new parent" moment.
Another of my favorite parts was when you wrote "His chin was resting on her shoulder (he must have been tiptoeing)" I just thought that was really cute.
Overall, I thought you did a good job with the prompt. I liked the Snow White motif.
I did notice a couple minor spelling errors - easily overlooked - but your grammar was very good.
Thanks again for your entry! Good luck :]
I was a bit disheartened when I read the kids name was Lani (r/l issues) but whatever. It was absolutely adorable!
Good work