February 26th, 2007 at 10:06pm
Wow! I like the hint of mystery in this story. You should work on characterisation of the main characters (I noticed that in your oneshot too. You should pay more attention to the characters). Otherwise, it's a quite good and enthralling story.
~ Helena
I do agree with her on the characterisation though, but it doesn't seem like a very big issue here as it does on some other stories. You're doing a great job here. I love the whole playing with knives concept and the way you reduced their dialogue to such simplicity, it gives the story a completely new feel.
I'm looking forward to more. :)