Begin Again - Comments

Really mibba? you wanna be stupid. Well fine, I will confess my love for this story in 200 characters! Okay. So, one, I love cute little phrases that you can use anywhere, just like you did in your story. It reminds me of my own love and how much I miss him. You have a creative writing style, though I think I mentioned that in my last comment too. I enjoyed this. :)

(Take that mibba and your stupid character minimums! mwahaha)

i like this story, a lot actually. it's not something i'm so used to reading. it was really well written, very descriptive, very beautiful. i loved all the little phrases. they were super cute. :)

watch them to turn to ashes - them turn to

always come for - full?

I like how you begin this with the world beginning, and that it's okay because it's a new start - then you end it the same way. :) There's a whole lot of assurances in that, and it also reinforces this line; it will always come (for)full circle. Like the story comes full circle. :) Thought that was rather neat.

Symbolically destroying the past as we run the red light. - I also like this line here, just because of that symbolism behind it. :)

I also like how you've used lines from songs, and how if you know the lyrics, they help set the mood in a way.

I think it's quite good too that while there's all these thoughts going on, there's the mix of narration on where they're going - and it's written quite well because it doesn't sound as if it's the narrator telling the driver where to go - but it just seems like it's still all in the head - which is cool because it doesn't take away from the thoughts. :)

But overall, I love the idea of the whole thing being a beginning rather than something ending. :)

This was.. amazing.
How long did it take for you to write this?
So many songs, so many words.. It must of taken forever, no?
I think you're the only person who can pull this off perfectly.
Job well done, Dru!
<3

That's a really good idea. You pulled all of the phrases together perfectly. It was amazing. I hope to read more things from you soon =D!!

This was the first thing of yours I have read (I read it last night). I didn't comment then because I just had to read as much of your other things as possible. I just thought I'd comment this one right now because it felt fitting, to comment on the first one I read :)

I'm astounded by how well you managed to get it to flow using so many song lyrics without just putting them in there for the sake of it. You made them your own, whilst still giving me goosebumps when it was songs I know and love, and even more so when it was songs I've never really seen as beautiful put into this context where I did see them as beautiful.

This is where we start over. Racing through the city, windows down. My hand out the window as we speed through the darkness, the air cold on my fingers, numbing them, cold to the bone. Lights will guide you home. I loved this part (I would say the most but it's hard to decide). At first I thought it was all about running away with someone you love, maybe running away from bad things, but when I read this part I rethought, and instead I think it's about running towards good things and finding a place for you and this person to be with forever.

We can’t go anywhere except together- When I read this part I changed my mind a little bit again, or more, really, I just realised that maybe they aren't looking for somewhere at all, and maybe it's just one big metaphor for wanting to be with just that one person, being completely obsessed with your relationship that you want there to be nothing else, that the whole idea of building this new world and new life and really wanting to build a world entirely about and with that person. I may be thinking to deeply into this, but that was what I got from it.

I like how you set it in 2012, with the end of the world prophesies it fit wonderfully, because you are describing the end of something, or rather, the beginning of something new.

This line got me particularly emotional.
Christmas in Paris, can you imagine?
I think because the character is speaking to the person who they love, and actually asking a question. The sense of togetherness was just overwhelming by this point.

We’re out of sight, out of mind.
This line made me see the characters as very fragile, almost as if they are hiding from something, like the main character wants to create this world with the person they love because it is the only thing they see as safe anymore...

You don’t need to worry about me leaving anymore
Anymore? I thought that was sad...it shows that perhaps the character has been frightened of such a strong connection before. That's just a thought, but this just shows how real these people are, that they have made mistakes and have regrets, but they won't worry about them now, or at least really wish they needn't.

I will probably think of more to say about this the more I think about it but this is all I'll post :)
This actually really helped me feel some sort of freedom too, and I fell in love with it even more whilst explaining to you why I loved it. Perhaps because of the whole looking forward and new worlds. It is full of hope. Thank you for writing something like this :) It is writers like you I aspire to be like.

Story Review Game

...when Ryan opens his eyes and realizes what he's done.
- With an summary ending like that, how could you not want to read on? It should be no secret that I think you're an amazing writer, and if it is a surprise well... I guess you know now.

The world isn’t ending; it’s starting over. Me and you, together, tight. It’s not ending; it’s beginning again.
-
- Like a user above me said, this piece seems to be so personal to the narrator. It's like a confession, a peak into the innermost thoughts of the character. It's raw and real, and expresses such a large amount of emotion.

We are poets and lovers, Shakespeares and Brownings. I can be Poe and you will be my Annabel Lee. We can live like Jack and Sally if we want to. You can always find me.
- I think this is probably one of my favourite excerpts. Amazing.

I hope you never give up writing, Dru. Seriously. You're ability to manipulate and twist words and produce these amazing pieces of art is ... I can't think of a word fitting. Amazing, inspiring, beautiful, none of those can sum it up for me.

I've already said this, but you've portrayed so much emotion in Begin Again, it's wonderful. You can feel the narrator's desperation for a new beginning, for a chance to start over. I loved this. Good job doesn't seem to cut it, but it's all I can come up with. So good job.

amazing, and it hurts because I want the boys to get back together so much.

very good job, as always.

don't even really know what to say about this except that it was perfect. it felt like a spill of words, a confession or a secret. it felt authentic. it felt like ryan's true voice - We are poets and lovers, Shakespeares and Brownings. I can be Poe and you will be my Annabel Lee. We can live like Jack and Sally if we want to. - mixing parts of himself, and the people who made him. it was honest. it was perfect.

I feel like I'm constantly repeating myself with you -
Bloody Brilliant.
All the time.

I love this and I love you and I love how you're the only author who can break me down so much with less than 3000 words.
Thank you.

This is absolutely beautiful.
If there were even words to describe this; they would be perfect, without a flaw. You are a very talented person, and I think you should continue to write!
Again, amazing work. I loved it.

Dru, oh dear me girl...

I don't think there is a word to describe how perfect that is because perfect just isn't good enough. The line from I Miss You by Blink 182 was dreamy and Painting Flowers. And I'm not saying that because they are some of my favorite songs, I'm saying they fit into the story so well!

And the like about Christmas in Paris. I'm not sure if it is a song and I jsut don't know it or it if was your words but...that was one of the best lines. :)

That was incredible Dru.
It was full of emotion and read almost like poetry.

You kiss me hard, almost too much teeth when we get out of the car.
Perfect.

New story.
~750 words.
Lyrical oneshot.
You will recognize words and phrases and know they are not mine.
Ryden.

Happy reading!

Thank you for every review/comment.

xoxox
-Dru