The Sharpest Lives - Comments

Quit detailed beginning and ending, but empty chapter seven. I would have loved more emotions, feelings, expressions. I'm really sorry to say it, but I liked your short stories better. There were moments in this story that were truly beautiful, but there were also hollow places. And I know that my stories are not better, but it still feels like some chapters need stitching. It's nothing major. However please don't think that it sucks because seriously you write very good, at the age of fourteen I was tragic, terrible even. As I re-read my essays I only laugh, because they are so naïve and stupid. Your stories have meaning. Keep it up.

I love it! :) Wondeful!

You have a nice chapter length, its not too long or short.
And your style is relaxing to read, it does a lot of the explaining for you.
Another thing you do well is setting the tone, I love your flow, too.

I have one small query though: Is it realistic to see a ten year old, dressed head-to-toe in pink at eleven o'clock on the bus? :3 I know it happens but normally small things like that matter with fiction.

Nice introduction. Not too much to carry and not too little to hold on to. Just right. Good job.