July 7th, 2010 at 05:14pm
This story truly grabs my interest in a way that is refreshing for me....*sigh*...I do have one tiny suggestion though. It's up to you whether you use it or not.
I love the attraction and love between Kat and Frank, however, you could possibly try to make them a tad more dynamic by allowing them to go through an entire chapter or two without having sex.
I know it seems hypocritical from me since I like a good sex scene just as much as another person, however I have read stories where it starts to become annoying when all they're doing is rolling in the sack. It's definitely not going to be as interesting without "doing the dirty" but it will make the story more believable if she like hung out with her father or possibly got another friend! Or even if he hung out with his friends.
Sorry to put all of this, just doing as you told me and commenting :D
Love the story to pieces though. It is truly adorable <3
I think I'll stop boring/ annoying you now *sheepish smile*....you definitely have a great story though, bear that in mind :D
but i loved this, it was so well written and so descriptive. more soon?