Forever Alone - Comments

I really enjoyed reading this. (bonus points on the layout by the way)
It was intense and simple, and simplicity is great in writing. It flowed well and I liked the way you changed the mood toward the end. Nice work. :)

I love this!
It's really amazing and so beautiful.
The layout was gorgeous and the banner kind of scared me. xD
It all flowed so well and everything about it was wonderful.
Great job. <3

And instead of looking at her through my eyes, I looked at her through my heart.
This line, right here, just ran away with my imagination to have beautiful babies. :) <3
I love this, teehee.

The detail is beautiful and flows like poerty. The idea is lovely and so is the layout. At first, I was a touch spooked by the picture, but the details kept me all wrapped up and feeling gooey and safe. :)

Like fraud. said, this was beautiful with a capital beeee.<3 :)

This was beautiful. <3

I like the idea of this a lot.
It had a very poetic feel to it but not a poetic flow.
I feel like if you worked a bit more diction and description it would flow nicely.

I noticed a few errors.

I struggled a smile that doesn't exactly sit well. I would try using I forced a smile
Also you forgot to capitalize I in two parts of the story.

and each time i felt it increasing
us, and i couldn't wait for

This was honestly beautifly written. You're so good at describing what you see. You're very good at using your poetry skills into your writing.