The Woods - Comments

Part three! Yes! :) I loved it and I love the way you described the forest, I could really envision it. All your updates are worth the wait.

:D

That is all!

This is reaaallyyy good. Seriously, everything flows so well, and you're a great characterizer (not a real word obviously, but you can roll with it). Especially the detail about Samson's mother always wearing men's shoes, it was like, gah. Kind of killed me in a tiny way.

However, I think the way you wrote her and Michael's argument during the coffin-shopping in the style of a script didn't quite fit in with the style of the rest of the story. Also, in the sentence, "Tears hotter than the air...and into my long, dirty blonde hair," I feel like the description of her hair wasn't really needed, since she already mentioned what her hair was like. Like, it might just be me, but when I read a story written in 1st person, I imagine the person talking to me, and when someone speaks, they'd usually just refer to their hair as "my hair".

But I really like this. It's kind of magical in its own way, and I can't wait to see what happens next.

wow great starting! Really interesting and i cant wait for the next update!

"Their malevolence felt almost like a well-worn coat or the warm arms of a friend." -- that was probably my favourite line.

I was so excited when I saw you update. I can't wait for her to enter the woods. As always, you blow me away. Can't wait for mooooorrrrreeeee. :)

&, btw, I found this because of Avalanche's rec ( http://stories.mibba.com/read/125565/Fever/26/ ) at the bottom. I'm happy I did!

*subscribes* perhaps try white text instead? & update because I reallyyyyy like this so far!

Man you're good! I am seriously enjoying this!

Um yes, wow, continue.

NOW, DAMMIT.

Kidding.
Sort of.

Awesome.

Seriously, why has no one found this? I will say it over and over again, you are so damn talented and the way you write opens portals and doors into worlds where I want to stay for hours. If it's the last thing I do, I will make sure everyone reads this.

Don't give up, you are way too talented to do so.