more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more!! ive waited for i think over a year for this hahahaha XD i freaking love it!
First of all, I have to say that I enjoyed reading your story because it was somewhat original on here. Second of all, I have to say that I was disgruntled due to the immense amount of mistakes it had. Third of all, you should change the point of you to third pov omniscient. That way you wouldn't have to change pov's quickly and to be honest, they were annoying because they didn't have much of what we didn't know. That pov would let me as the reader see what the characters are thinking without changing pov's. I think this'll make your story even more phenomenal! Trust me! xx
well I know it happened in chapter 19 but I couldn't really go back and read the other ones to check...but if you just bear it in mind for later that's cool too...
Btw...is the story finished? Because it kinda sounded like an ending...if so :(
this story is reallly nice and sweet...it has an innocence to it ....though your spelling could use work lmao...and sometimes you start writing using I and stuff then you randomly switch over to she like you change the point of view...but I still love the story! Update soon <3
I really like it! It is a large change from most of the stories on here, all silly little fanfics ussually along the same line. Original. Like it. Decent line so far.