June 10th, 2010 at 04:55am
Holy crap, that was depressing at the end.
You're an amazing writer. Holy crap. Even though it wasn't that long, I could already have a picture of it all and my own story of it. This is really amazing. I loved it. :D
I feel like it would be more visually appealing with a photograph in the layout.
Flickr, has some really good ones. It's where I find all of mine.
The only error I could fine was that you didn't capitalize Haines. Since it's a brand it needs to be capitalized.
Otherwise, I liked this a lot. Like the commenter above me said, it's very sad.
But very very good. I enjoyed this a lot.
I think it may be my favorite out of everything I've read of yours.