Never Look Back - Comments

This was wonderful.
Emotional and dark and even a little haunting.
I really liked the repetition of "Years pass, and I grow and grow and grow." It really connected the entire piece, it kept it coherent.
I loved the ending as well.
Amazing job.

You immediately got to the point, and I liked that.
I also liked that you used the same sentence again a few times. Years pass, and I grow and grow and grow. I loved that.

In the beginning, I felt so sorry for the girl. I hate the father with all I have, and the mother, too. You don't leave your baby girl behind like that! I don't class her as a mother, actually.
As the story went on, and the girl grew, I got a little happier. I was so glad that she realized she is someone, and that she's lovely.
I love her reaction at the end. Just telling her father everything and then going away. Leaving him behind, almost dead, and never looking back.

You did an amazing job <3 I loved it!

The very first words drew me in. Let's paint the scene. Immediately, I felt sympathy for the main character. Indeed, you painted the scene vividly in my mind. The imagery was just great.

What I really liked was the repeated sentences. One could ask... Years pass and I grow and grow and grow. It made everything seem more powerful.

The last two paragraphs made me think, "Good for her." I kind of teared up. No, I lied. I did. Great job. =]

Cows and spider monkies this was amazing! The detail was greater than epic and the message
was extremely strong. The emotions also felt extremely thorough. Near the end, I swear I was close to tears, aha.

The layout & picture were pretty lovely as well. (:

This was a nice short. I really liked the ending, and I'm glad she said what she said. I hate abuse so much and to think that it's the parent? It just annoys me. I really liked that you wrote in present tense. I love writing in present tense, it really makes it feel like I'm there. Anyways, nice job. Your one-shots are always amazing. :)

When I first saw the picture, I was like, Oh, shite, an abuse story :l Abuse stories really get to me - and I can thank God that I was blessed with amazing parents xD - and it hurts to read them. I'm glad that she got to say what she did at the end. As morbid as it sounds, I smiled a bit when I read that. Great job (: <3

I loved the layout and the picture. :)

This was very creative!
Very emotional and I really enjoyed it.

Great job!

I loved the layout. Especially that picture.
I like how this was written. I haven't really read any stories that work in present tense, but you did it. The imagery was fantastic and it was so sad.
Lovely job <3

The layout was amazing. I love the picture.
This was written so well. I really felt like I was there seeing it happen, seeing her grow up.
Awesome story! :D

I love this, I almost cried. :/
The last part was amazing, where she spoke about how he wished he were hitting himself instead of her. This just. . . astounds me. Really, it truly does. I love it. <3
I agree with Dr. I'm going to disregard the fact that this is a one-shot and say you should write more. <3

One question: was the little girl in the beginning the main character?
The layout was simple, but wonderful at the same time. And the picture was really pretty too.
The whole thing kept my attention. You are a magnificent writer!

Oh, my god. I teared up. :/

It was beautiful and scary at the same time. <3

You're awesome at descriptions. I really don't know how someone couldn't like this. I'll admit, I'm good at plots, but I don't have the patience for descriptions. But you, you're good at both. Keep it up up up.

I loved the layout, it was simple yes but I thought it fit the story.

You're a really good writer, no grammar errors.

It painted really vivid images in my mind

and just overall I loved it

This has nothing to do with the story but the layout seems a little, I don't know, plain?

But as far as the story goes, I didn't see any grammatical errors that stuck out, at least.
Your writing is strong, your writing is brilliant. There's so much that this painted in my mind.
I love the confidence of the girl in the end, as well. I seriously adored this. <3

D:< If I could copy and paste the whole thing here and tell you I adored it, I would! Seriously it was so deep and amazing that I could re-read it over and over.

I loved the imagery, and it just painted a very vivid picture.

This needs to be more than a one-shot.

I love this. Flawless, yet dark...and, well, it did make me cringe a little. It's sad. :\

And it left me hanging. Therefor, I want to know more.

So...write another chapter. I'll subscribe.

/doesn'tcarethatthisisaoneshot

The only thing I didn't really like was the tense you wrote this in.
For some reason present tense just is so awkward for me to read.
But still, you wrote this wonderfully.

there is an army of broken glass scattered all about, invading the next room in an unorganized war formation. I fucking love the imagery in that line. Broken glass represented to war. That's epic.

Very good. I need to go read more of your things.

Oh my, this is just absolutely amazing. I don't think I could ever write something like this, but you did it so flawlessly.

Wow.
This one struck a chord, with me, and the writing was beautiful. The writing was strong.
I understood how the little girl felt, and even how the words effected her, as well.