After All This Time, I Get the Truth - Comments

I liked this; it was very original and I liked the surprise ending with Jess's note. I like how you put the suspense in when Josh didn't call her back for a month. Overall, I liked it! :)

This was pretty interesting, but I'm not a big fan of the way that it was actually written, and I couldn't really get into it. It felt like you were telling us what was going on, rather than showing us. I can't really describe it well myself in a way that makes sense, so I'll just copy and paste from Wikipedia:

"Write in a manner that allows the reader to experience the story through a character's action, words, thoughts, senses, and feelings rather than through the narrator's exposition, summarization, and description."

This story was amazing i really loved it like wow it was sooo interesting :D and just. Wow

Aw, that was really cute. And I like how you used the sentence in the story. (:
It was also kind of sad, though, since Emilia had so much trouble finding the right guy.
Great job and good luck in the contest. :3