This is pretty good, though like many people in my first story said, you have to watch out for grammar and spelling error...if you don't some people report that :P Ridiculous right? but anyways the plot is good, sounds like you and I think alike because I wrote a story kinda like this in 6th grade, but it was for school so it was shorter. And I'm gonna stop myself from rambling now XD but keep up the good work :D