Imaginary - Comments

Dude, this is so sad. </3 I almost cried, no joke! I only read the first chapter but it's still so touching. When I saw the cute bear in the banner I thought it was going to be a sweet story but no. The poor girl, she's only five and her dad tells her her mother left?! D: Aw, man. This is one of my favourites by you, keep going! <3

I absolutely adored this.
I can honestly say this doesn't relate to my life in the slightest, but it made me cry.
Your writing is beautiful, your word choices flawless.
I'm still crying now as I write this.
Wonderful, wonderful job.

This is beautiful.
Like, I'm slightly speechless right now.
I'm just...in awe at the emotion and the raw detail you've got here.
I agree with cola frank. I was expecting a fluffy little kid story but just no.
Five stars bb.

This had a calm, nostalgic atmosphere to it. I can relate to this, as well as many others can-the whole mother and father splitting up. I can also relate to having an imaginary friend. Can't we all? The layout was simple, and nice, and the chapters were short and sweet.

I like how the first, and second chapter started; with a simile.

Chapter One.
It’s four o’clock in the morning, and a little girl with hair as long as the sky and eyes as tired as the earth is awoken by shouting, a slamming door, and then a crash.

Chapter Two
It’s twelve in the afternoon, and a little girl with a face as sad as the sea and hands shaky as wind is sitting alone at a table decorated with paint and fingerprints.

Beautiful. Simply beautiful.

I can relate to this so much. I cried. It's just...beyond words.

I can't even begin to...wow. This just wow'd me. It's one of my favorite stories on this site, simply because I cried.

Beautiful.

Dr.

This is so beautiful. It's very...lyrical. The words you used and how you described things was flawless. I love it so much, its so terrifically sad...

Dude. I cried.

The emotion was like...so there. So, well described. I saw the bear and expected a happy happy joy joy story, but I cried. legit. It was so sad. I mean, no little girl at the age of five should have to hear that. However, I'm sure many people can relate to this story.

I really have to say this is one of my favorites.

This was really...nice. It's a wonderful short story about overcoming a bad event and in the end everything seems to be for the better. I liked Rick, and I felt like he can represent so many things. A friend, a family member, anything. In fact, I feel like the story, thought it is it's own story, can be applied in so many other situations and I like how easy it is to relate to the story. And choosing a child as the main character makes it different because children are so innocent.

Overall, I loved it.

This story was beautiful even though it was about tragedy.
The layout was lovely.
Great story.

The title reminds me of a little kid, for some reason. It's just pure, and innocent. I like it.

The layout screams MURDER THE TEDDY BEARS to me. o.o

The summary, which is a simple sentence, is very true. I like it.

Part one hit home. =/ My parents use to fight like that, but - past that, you're a great writer. (: Good job.

It's so beautifully sad. I think it hits close to home for many, which is why it has such an effective. Laced with the descriptions and such raw emotion, this is really an amazing piece.

I adored how you branded her the little girl, it just makes her appear so innocent, so vulnerable. It makes you just

There is only an unblinking blank stare, Once he realizes this, her daddy tries out a smile, failing miserably.
Once is capitilized.

It's honestly amazing.

I almost cried! My parents divorced when I was 5 and I trust issues so this really touched my heart =)

The repetition was very nice, I liked how it repeatedly said 'the girl', it made it seem like a narrator was telling the story which made it a much more interesting story to read.
I liked your descriptions of the girl's predicament and the comparison of her feelings with the elements of the world. It was a nice change to the typical adjective's normally found in stories.
I liked how it was the father who stayed, rather than the mother. It was a nice change to what usually happens. :)

The description in the first part was really nice. Her walking into the room and 'fleeing like the culprit, not the victim' was my favorite line. I've never had an imaginary friend but I know lots of kids have, and her resorting to him as her only friend is something that does happen to kids. I really liked the ending with that line about repaying him. I thought it was cute. :) I agree with above, I was surprised to find that the mother had left and not the father.

Oh god, this almost made me cry.

It isn't often that someone writes about parents' divorcing without the father being the one that's absent, so that was a nice change.

I love the descriptive language in this, especially how you described her appearance. This was almost how my life was when I was five, it's really scary. It's hard to find a story like this in the sea of stories on this site. I'm so glad I found this.

This was amazing.

The emotion was... just given out so well.
It was there, yes, but it was there in a unique sort of way that caused more tears than most drama would.

I really loved this story. Just everything about it is perfect.
One of the best short stories I've read in a long time! And I'm serious about that.

I loved it. A lot. <3

That was great. I almost feel like crying. I, as others, can relate because my parents got divorced at the age of 5, on my first day of kindergarden, and I was quiet and didnt talk to others much, keeping to myself. Slowley somthing urged me to be closer to people, my family, new friends. I didnt notice untill after, but I was acting very dead, unfeeling.

:) Thank you for writing this, it was wonderful.

I agree with the comments above me.

All of the thoughts and emotions were portrayed just beautifully, you didn't make the little girl think like an adult, she definitely thought and acted like a kid.

I just loved the last part the most:

Rick wasn’t real, but sometimes I feel like he was more alive than anyone else I knew. No one will ever replace him in my heart. I can’t say for sure, but I think he saved my life. He will always be my best friend, and I know it’s foolish, but sometimes I wish I could repay him.

It reminds me of an imaginary friend I had when I was younger.

Absolutely brilliant job, well done!

This was as sad story.
It has a lot of detail in it.
This is an emotional story, and you did a really good job.
Keep on writing, you're good at it.