I'm With You - Comments

Yes, I'm stalking your stuff today, Hubby. XD

I'm gonna say this, your lay out is dark and amazing. :) I love it.

And I love that song by Avril. :)

Sam and I had known each other since we were just pups
^That line made me go awww. :) It must be the word pups. <3

Aww, Alison must really care for Sam. And it's sad that she was waiting for him for such a long time. :) But she showed a lot of dedication though. She must really love him. I can sense all of Alison's and Sam's emotions, namely Alison's though.

Awwww. That's so sad! You brought tears ot my eyes, EverRose! >_< And yes, I'm a sap for romances, even if they have one person who had died. All the emotions in this entire story is beautiful and they come out strong. I like all the details you put into it as well. They were amazing beyond any words that I could even say.

Let's just say that I'm really stunned and in awe at your amazing writing prowess. And I think this is the longest comment that I have ever written for a one shot. X3

I love you and your amazing a** story. <3 Continue writing more lovely stories like this one. :)

Wow. Just...didn't expect that. I like all the little things you added about their past. That gave a very nice feel and detail to the one-shot. I thought you did very well. One-shots are hard to do...in my opinion.

Not very many grammar mistakes. I didn't see or noticed anything really. The idea was nice...would probably name a nice chapter-ed story....

Firstly, very dark. D:

Though it made me think back to my younger years, that song, when it was badass to say damn<3

It wasn't that long, but it sure was damn sad. Holy crap. I hate deaths in stories/oneshots because there's seriously nothing more sad than that, because then it's like... done. Nothing can be done. Gone.
With other things it can be repaired and all good, but with death it's so... not like that at all.

The twist at the end was good, I thought it was cute that her spirit had to meet him no matter what<3
It was just like an aw, that's so cute moment. You can tell they were like, super close.
But it's also makes it super sad because she's dead and he's not.
It was amazing in that heartbreaking way, y'know? :)

The only thing I noticed was that you switched "his" to "he's" a couple times here and there.

That was so sad D:

I loved the story and the layout.
It was so sad. :(
You're an amazing author.

I love the layout, I think it goes perfectly with the one-shot.
This was so sad! I knew she was probably the dead one
because of the description, but still... It was so sweet.
This was a bit eerie, but in a good way, it sent chills
up my back when I thought more about it. Good job!

The layout was perfect, it gave the perfect mood to fit the story. Which a lot of people on Mibba can't master. It started out a bit cliche, but then the ending made me do a double take. xD I loved how the song seemed to be made for the story, rather than the other way around.

Great work, you're an amazing writer.

I felt really bad for a minute because I thought I read and commented everything by you already, but then I found this, which I didn't read it, haha! x]
Anyways, the song matches this so perfectly. This was so sweet and innocent - but so creepy and twisted at the same time. My mouth totally hit the floor when he said she was dead o.O
I also found a few minor mistakes here.
"Alison." astonishment lacing his voice. - Astonishment should be capitalized.
"Of course I'd be here. Why wouldn't I be?" I laughed. - Maybe it's just me, but you could omit the second be.
"Ali, sweetie, we can't-" his tears started dancing with the rain - his should be capitalized.
"Alison...you're dead." he said with sorrow filled eyes. - After dead there should be a comma.
"Ali look at yourself. " he said. - Again, after yourself should be a comma.
"Drunk driver. You were walking home and he-he hit you. On the way to the hospital...you died." he fell to the ground and started sobbing. - he should be capitalized.
"Ali you were gone. I swear you were but you're here now," he looked up to me. - Omit the comma, put a period, and capitalize he.
Other than that, it was wonderful. You did brilliantly on this. Lovely job! <3 Oh, and good luck with the contest (:

I like the layout a lot. I think the colors go together really well.

The only thing to keep me company was the soft drumming of the rain. I love rain. It makes every story amazing <3

Wow. Things were going so cute and sweet and perfect, until he said that she was dead! My mouth literally opened. That was like, heartbreaking, curious, and creepy, all at the same time. I really love your style. Your stuff is so sweet and innocent, then you make it twisted and eerie.

I loved this song way back, and I think you did a brilliant job executing it. I think I’m gonna go youtube it right now :D

Good luck in your contest! You deserve an honorable mention—this is stunning!

That was freaking just jenvesfj where did that come from ?
I love this! (=
I want more of this but :3 I know you probably won't make more :P

I didn't know she would be dead! There are tears in my eyes right now. It was absolutley beautiful. -sniffles- I hope you do well in the contest, actually, I know you will because this story is truly touching.

*it wasn't predictable.

That was epic.
It was clever too, how you reminded the reader that she'd only felt the cold.
It was sad, and I liked the twist in it--it was predictable.
"We didn't belonf to this place,"
-You have some grammar errors.

It was sad she dead, but it was good.
It shocked me in a way.
I liked it.(:
I like the background too and the banner.
It was beautifully done.
<3
Good job, love(:

Whoa.

That was awesome.

Good job, although I'm sad that she's dead. I thought they would run away together. :/

This was...amazing. I agree it could use more emotion in it but all in all you did a pretty good job of it. I did notice one error, though.

I promised him I would meet him here so we could ran away.

I believe the 'ran' should be 'run', correct?

I was very shocked that she was dead, though. I didn't expect her to be. xD I really liked this, great job. (:

"Alison." astonishment lacing his voice.
I am not too fond of this sentence. To me, there are words missing. Maybe it could be something like this: ”Alison,” someone said, astonishment lacing his voice. Or something along those lines.

Wow… she’s dead. I really didn’t expect that to happen. I am in love with this one-shot. I love the fact that she was only there because of a promise. It broke my heart. I really, truly loved this!

wow i didn't see that coming...you know the fact that she's dead...but thats a good thing for reader to not expect things. you did a really good job on portraying emotions [:

That gave me goosebumps...... I loved it!

That was...touching..amazing..beautiful..its like i could feel it o.o like..actually see what was going on. I guess the music in the background helped xD