They're Gonna Eat Me Alive - Comments

:D It's quite sad this is ending, but does it make sense that I'm proud of the story for you? Haha, that barely even makes any sense does it? From how this ended, I'm guessing things are all going to be great -creepy smile-
thank you for writing this story xD
bye.

Aww, I'm going to miss this story. I like that it's kind of an open ending, that way--in my mind at least--it can be a happy ending ^_^

I always get so excited when I get that email telling me this story has been updated :D I'm going to miss it.

AHHHHH! Sorry, I haven't been able to go on here AT ALL! But I'm commenting now... he-he. Yes, so I now stand to believe, this is so messed up! D: I feel bad for Ryan, and Brendon is just confusing me! Please excuse how much this comment lacks more uh.. commentness ha-ha, yes I'm aware that "commentness" isn't a word. Bye...

And continuously comment I shall, I have to keep up my record now don't I? I couldn't help but notice that this chapter was really short, but updates are updates just the same.

I like tis, though I came to it pretty late. Keep going.

Ryan seems so sad, I hope things get better. I also hope more people comment aside from me!

Oh noes! I was the only comment :( I hope Ryan gets found.

Brendon seems very unperseptive, it seems unlikely that he wouldn't notice something. Either way, still a good chapter.

Story/Review Game:
Note: I'll review all five chapters ;P
Warning: Nit-picking possibility. All things written are opinionated, feel free to ignore everything.

Chapter One:
"Ryan was afraid that he would fuck up—that’d he fall on his face when he went out on stage, forget his music… just something would go wrong."
I don't believe it should have the 'd at the end.

"Ryan sighed and rolled onto his side in the hotel bed in the hotel room he was sharing with Brendon."
The word "hotel" was repeated too often in this sentence.
Opinion: Try something like, "...his side on the bed in the hotel room...."

"Ryan kind of wished that Brendon was awake right now because he knew that Brendon could easily help Ryan relaxing just by telling him that everything would be fine and that they were going to do great."
Wrong tense for the word. Should be "relax." Maybe a comma after the word "fine."

"Ryan turned to look at Brendon, and surprised at how close their faces were to each other."
The word "was" should be added between those two words.

This was cute, lol.

Chapter Two:
So, the beginning of this chapter was a shock. A good one, though.

"The tour had ended just a little over an hour ago and the moment they had set foot into the hotel room they would be staying in for the night, Brendon had pretty much attacked Ryan, pressing his body firmly against Ryan’s as he slammed him into the wall nearest them."
Only problem I had was that word. Should be "in," plain and simple.

That ending wasn't nice. Lol, it was an act of evil from the author ;P

Chapter Three:
"Ryan didn’t want to be here, but Brendon was practically ignoring him."
Ok, so this is confusing to me. Ryan didn't want to be there, that I get. My question is, why? Was it because of Brendon ignoring him or something else entirely? If it's not because Brendon is ignoring him, you should make this into two separate sentences.

The ending to this chapter was bittersweet.

Chapter Four:
Small grammatical error here.
"Ryan ignored it and asked his question anyways.
There shouldn't be an "s" at the end of that word. It is singular. Always is, unless used in dialogue.

This ending was depressing. How could Brendon just pass back out like that?

Chapter Five:
These sentences, I loved;
"The thing was, though, that Brendon wasn’t aware that he was hurting Ryan."

"He knew that Ryan was almost completely gone."

Complete summary:
This story was very different. And even though the chapters were short, they all had something important to say; a point that got across with the emotions coming from the characters. Major gratz on writing this. I'm saying this honestly, and even though I tend to steer away from fan-fics, I enjoyed this. Hope you the best. (Can't wish it, 'cuz then it backfires).

This story needs WAY more readers! I don't get how people don't find it, come on people! Read this story, it's awesome! Update soon, I'm hating that Ryan is like this :(

This story does not get the credit it deserves, I hope more people discover it because it's great! More please :)

Well first that was sad. Why Brendon?! How can you not love Ryan, who can stand that? I also agree with the person above this comment. Oh! And I wish you luck for tomorrow. :)

Poor Ryan. :(

"I only want you to love me." that about broke my heart.

Please update soon:)

It makes me sad that this awesome story doesn't get more comments/reads. Can't wait for the next one!

And I shall comment again! I like how you never really know how much time has passed in between chapters, can't wait for more.

Hey you there! So I found this story, a long time ago thinking it wouldn't be continued :( BUT I saw that it was updated and went all "Holy bucket of cheese! It's updated!" so yeah I decided to comment, like I am doing now, and will now subscribe. Bye, Imma sub now.

I really like this story so far! The second chapter was really sad, though. That totally wasn't the answer Ryan was looking for D:

Yay first comment! I really like this story so far, it's well written. I can't wait to see where it goes, update please.