A Baby Vampire and Her Daddy - Comments

Nice book I love it. It's better then my vampire novel.

Oh and please read my need book (The Father Of My Child) it's some what dealing with the father and the child as you can see what the title say. And please comment it would mean a lot to me.

and i sowwey bout the tongue, its just the true blood thingy, i wasnt sure how to make it look okay and true blood-esk...lol

i dont mind the criticism, as long as you dont go like, oh u suck at this, and blah blah blah...lol...and for eric being ooc, he has a crush on bills kid so hes very pleading. and i kinda wrote this without really thinkin tht much...hehehehe

Oh, and forgot, the layout kinda distracted me; the tongue just sorta, was there. And the font's light color made it harder to red against the crimson. Might want to look a little into fixing it, if you want to of course. :)

Why hello thar~ Okay, I'm a grammer freak so I'm gonna point out the easy fix mistakes first :3

Summary
Whenever I open my mouth to scream my voice gets caught from the cold, misty fog that runs down my throat. Removed a comma and fixed "get". It's always good to have the summary in good condition. That was the biggest issue here, you used a very fine touch of detail that allowed for wonderful visuals and feelings. Well done.

Prologue
Okay, I'm not being rude but Eric seems a bit OOC(Out of character). Just him pleading and being so direct towards Bill, it bothers me a little. Another little peeve is how quickly the mood shifts. One minute they're about to cut out each other's throats and the next they're teasing and just mocking each other. Last little thing here is how fast you throw in Bill's daughter, I feel that maybe a little build up would have been better.

If you're not alright with constructive critisism, please tell me because some people get offended when I offer some help and what not. If you are okay, I'll read maybe a few more chapters later and comment some more to help. :)

In all, I am interested in the idea of Bill's daughter being a Vampire and Eric harboring affections for her, but I think you're throwing it out there to fast. It's never a bad idea to build up :3

A.S, out~

thats true blood symbol i guess you can call it.

I read the first chapter and it confused me a little, but eventually I got into it. I liked it :) Except the background, that tongue was a little creepy. But that doesn't really matter

awesome, im glad you like it:P

I only read the first chapter, abd I'm afriad to say IM HOOKED! Dude, this rocks! One of the best vamp stories I've read on here. I'm off to read the rest:) if my iPad dies before then, I will get to it later. :)

:DDD i like this story. haha please update soon.

ok, this has to do with my story bein reported....if you can read it, then go to the default layout...other people can read it.

im really sorry that i haven't updated in a while!!!!!!!!!!!!! im really swamped with homework!!!!!!!!!! i promise to get sumthin up here as soon as possible!!!!!!!

sorry about the slow updates, im really trying to catch up.....more comming soonnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, sorry about that, its been really hard to get online, will try to update Thursday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ughhh I can't wait for another update! I want to know what happens next!!!
No rush though, like I said, I know it will be worth it!

Awesome!!! I"m glad you are enjoying this.

I love it so far! I can't believe not more people are commenting, because you're doing a great job! I really hope you continue to write this story, and that you update soon!
I subscribed as well!

You're loved by,
-Kate.

I've only read the first chapter but it's great!!!! keep writing!!!

Ok, this is the 2nd time ive commented on this. I want you guys to comment so I know whether to continue or not......

Ok, like, I know everyone hates commenting on other people's stories but without your comments, idk what youre thinking, whether you like this story or not.....