Nicotine Distraction - Comments

Jesus Christ. I don't think I've ever been so moved by so few words before in my life. You have real talent here; it's amazing that you were able to convey such emotion and suffering in such a short amount of space. I actually really want to know more about what's going on, but in a way I also don't, because it would ruin the illusion.

This is written so beautifully, and is so different from what I expected, looking at the picture. Those last two sentences were so simple, and so crushing, that I nearly lost my composure. How brutally soul-crushing.

Oh, this is for my contest. :3

I'd like to say how wonderful your banner is. I like how you tied the theme of your drabble into it-- repetition. The entire layout is just beautiful, and very pleasing to the eye.

Your entire story is magnificent. It captures the reader with the first sentence and doesn't let go at all. It's powerful, and moving, and wonderful, from beginning to end. I read it three times because I loved it so much. (= You're an incredibly talented author.

Words appear in the cloud of fumes and they proclaim the truth, the truth that he’s been trying so hard to avoid.

Favorite line.

Thank you for submitting your entry early!

this was really amazing.
despite the part about losing the girl, i could relate to it.

i really liked how you described things, but you could always add more details.

He's lost in that pattern, allowing himself to drown and be consumed by nothing other than the simple cycle of respiration.

That sentence means so much. When I read that, I knew he either wanted to forget, remember, or vanish. It holds so many emotions, it overflows with underlying meanings. That line itself... it's beautiful. I could feel the tension the whole time, the chest gripping emotion. When I read she's gone, I felt like part of me was gone with her.

Words appear in the cloud of fumes and they proclaim the truth, the truth that he’s been trying so hard to avoid.

That broke my soul.