Sigh....just wondering when you were gonna update again....???
January 11th, 2011 at 07:46pm
What a foxy banner, I must say!
I read chapter 7 and * (random, I know), just so you know what this comment applies to.
I liked how action packed everything was, and how when you transition into a new character, you always end with something suspenseful. I'm sure you avidly keep your readers interested.
Also, I noticed some verb tense and grammar issues in a few places..
"However, there was a good chance that this psychopath wouldn’t let him go and kept him on to do his dirty work."
"She fairly growled as she swiftly turned around to grab her luggage."
Did you mean faintly?
"This was bad and (you need a he here)almost wished he had died back in Scotland instead of letting Alex drag his arse off the battlefield. "
