Oh my God. :( That's so sad. I'm glad that you didn't end up going through with it, though. Thank God that song came on and woke you up. You definitely deserve to live your life, the way you want to, even if it's not up to what your mom wants.
That really stinks. But you should be who you want to be. I know that's clichéd advice and everything, but it's true. It's gonna be hard, since your mom has these expectations for you. Have your own expectations because you're the person you want to be, not the person she wants you to be. :D