Let Me Know - Comments

Holy balls go Aubrey

I must wonder when your next chapter is coming on. It's such a great story to just be forgotten.

I really like your story & hope you update frequently. Can't wait for the next chapter. (:

Can we get the McDonald's motto up in here? "I'm lovin' it!"

Must... read... more... :D <3

AAHHHHHH! I LOVE THIS STORY!!!! AHHHHHH!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!! :O

This story caught me off guard. I love it just upset how she made the decision of giving up the baby without letting the baby daddy know she was pregnant.

This is an amazing story and I can't wait to read more (: !

This is an amazing story and I can't wait to read more (: !

This is an amazing story and I can't wait to read more (: !

First, I'd just like to say that your characters aren't the most descripted characters in the world, but they're not the least descripted either. I like how you focused more on describing their personalities instead of their physical appearance. It gives readers the freedom to picture the characters in any way they want. Aubrey's sarcastic thoughts give humor to a serious situation, which I love, but I think she's being a little too dramatic about everything. I don't know if that's just a personality trait or what, but it gets a little annoying. I found a few spelling errors and quite a few grammatical errors, but you definitely have potential as a writer. I think if you improve the grammar and spelling and focus on little ways to describe the characters, this will be a killer story. -A

First, I'd just like to say that your characters aren't the most descripted characters in the world, but they're not the least descripted either. I like how you focused more on describing their personalities instead of their physical appearance. It gives readers the freedom to picture the characters in any way they want. Aubrey's sarcastic thoughts give humor to a serious situation, which I love, but I think she's being a little too dramatic about everything. I don't know if that's just a personality trait or what, but it gets a little annoying. I found a few spelling errors and quite a few grammatical errors, but you definitely have potential as a writer. I think if you improve the grammar and spelling and focus on little ways to describe the characters, this will be a killer story. -A

... like Sepia or Eggplant. - I don't know why you gave these words capital letters.

I really liked your third paragraph. It's really.... realistic, you know? Makes you realise it can happen to people like that. The sentence about how it symbolises the end of a (her) life not the start of a new one was great too. I think you just conveyed Aubrey's thoughts and feelings really well.

The talk about how everyone would react was pretty humourous. I think it's interesting that one paragraph it was horrible depressing thoughts, and then changed to a slightly lighter feel, but it was good and natural, not out of place whatsoever.

...young pregnant girl trying to make here way... - her way?

That was such a harsh break-up.....

Wow. A pretty intense and interesting first chapter. I think your writing is also very good, so no doubt you can make this story a great unique one that can stand out from all the rest :) Good job!

I love the idea of your story, but there a few tiny mistakes. It is stuff like colors don't need to be capitalized. Sometimes an ellipsis is better than a hyphen. Also there are some times when you only need one comma, not two in places. Like it would be "Yeah mom," not "Yeah, mom,".I think that the brothers are also very interesting. I want to see what is going to happen next.

i really like this! read mine?(and tell me what you think?) http://stories.mibba.com/read/411697/Dancing-in-the-rain/

I hope you update this soon. I'm thoroughly enjoying it. And I love your writing style. :)

Well the secret is finally out! I feel bad for Aubrey, she has to carry everything on her shoulders and worry about everyone else :( I hope it gets easier for her down the road. Plus I can't wait for the continuation of Waeden and Aubrey's conversation. Thanks for another great chapter, your story is amazing!!! :)

Great update! I'm really surprised that you don't have more subscribers/commenters. This is a great story!

I love this story! I can't wait until everyone finds out she's pregnant! Can't wait for the next chapter! Thanks for the update! :)

Ahhh!! The anticipattiiiooonnnn!! I really like this story! I can't wait till she tells Waeden!!