Between Life and Death - Comments

o.o

good job. =] I hadn't expected such an ending.

Very sad...… Good job

I hope you don't mind but I'm going to tell you some tips...
Writing tips? =] to help with length. the way you are writing is great.
Uhm.
Describe more things. Like if your saying your walking say how your walking. Maybe your slouching or walking confidantly. Helps with imagery and can add a few extra words to something like "I walked home." =]
In the second chapter you used the whole 'he yelled, I yelled" try to use different words. Shouting and yelling. Helps imagery a little better. Unless yell was the absolute perfect word try not to use it twice. Same with said and stuff like that. Just a random tip to keep in mind.
I have more tips on writing but as I said. your writing is great. =] Just length can be a little better.

It seems good but sad. =[

Well.. Great thing about mibba is that a chapter can be less then 200 words long. =] It is well written. though short... I applaud you for creating a part 2 though. I tend to lose my creativity at part 1 and stop. Good job.