Forever - Comments

Intresting begining

I like this layout much better. The background is really pretty. I thought that maybe the background in the picture could have been the same grey or a darker grey as the background, I’m not sure but the big black spaces that are left just doesn’t sit right with me. It kind of almost draws the attention away from the background.

The summary makes me think that maybe she’s a ghost? I looked at the pictures of him and her, so maybe she was a fan of the A7F guy (I’m not into band stuff so sorry if I get things wrong) and he finally noticed her?

Ok so I was happy to see that the words in the summary were big, then I clicked on your first chapter and I groaned. More small words for my terrible eye sight – haha.

”There has to be a fucking way out. I know there is,” - Your “ is turned the wrong way

I’ve always asked myself all those questions before. – I don’t think you need the always in that sentence.

I could spy the oh so - This doesn’t make any sense to me. Maybe she could spy into the familiar recording room. I don’t believe you need the ‘oh so’ it makes the sentence awkward to me.

not one of them have brought – has brought.

I like the idea of this story. The way you describe them watching over his friends is really cool. I didn’t expect them both to be dead.

I really like this :) I don't think I've ever read anything like it before. I really think you should continue writing, your writing style is very unique and I'm so interested in how this story will play out.

Its very interesting at first I thought it was more sci fi and dream like but it's very mysterious seeming and vague yet not in the way where it's like wtf I don't understand this shizz but in a way that's like... hmmm I really want to know about this. It kind of borders insanity and for some reason that makes me feel excited lol.

I also enjoyed the evry dramatic entrance/start obviously an attention grabber and makes you want to find out whats happening.

I was clueless as to who everyone was at first until the authors note and you where like it's an a7x fanfic and I was like ooh... interesting. I should have guess by the title but eeh guess it's a slow day.

The prologue itself is beautifully written and I really hope you continue this soon because... Well judging is next month and this definitely has a shot at winning but it will definitely have a shot at winning if there's a first chapter. :) love it though, I hope it doesn't make me cry ><

This is good, don't worry.

It's an interesting spin on death and spirits and souls and such. I'm a little confused as to how you can connect it to the summary though, but still, I like this.

Good work. <3

Wow, this is really good. I love your writing style.
It's flawless, and I can't wait to see where you go with this :)

Oh wow this one is really good as well. I'd like to offer some advice though, add some color to the layout :) I still love the lay out but it would be really cool with some color and it might help you get some readers :). Anothing thing I might add is to make your writing a tad bigger because it was hard for me to read.

But I do love this story. I'm going to subscribe because I want to know what happens. :)