Love's Magic - Comments

I think it would have been better as just "Riley's guide dog Fang barked."

You have also used BB code incorrectly. You should have these brackets: [ ] not < >

Otherwise, that was a nice start. I didn't spot any other errors, and it was pretty intense at times.

I think my favourite part was the initial description, with the sparkling and the snowflakes. I just think it was really well done and clear (and nice) to imagine.

I'll update when I can. Right now it's going to be hard though. I have a bunch of papers to write for school...

Wow, this is really really awesome. It's very well-written and descriptive :D I love it.
*subscribe*
Update soon, alright??