Been to Hell - Comments

I had bookmarked this story, but didn't get a chance to read it until now. I really like it though, it's so unique.

Chapter 5
I loved this chapter. It allowed us to see what Fenix does in her usual day to day life. I like the names you've used. Fenix, Ember :).

I just loved this whole chapter. Got to see more of what she thought. And hey I don't think it's THAT creepy...that she misses Zacky already…

Anyway two things. These two phrases.

I was awaken the next morning - should be I was awakened

seemed to get getting worse. 'be' not 'get'

Otherwise well written.

Onto chapter 6

The only thing I have to say is awwwwwwwwwwwwwww he gave her his hoodie! :D

Haha...Avenged are a cool band. Amazing update. I loved it. Seriously.

So sorry I haven't been keeping up, JV. I feel like an awful panda. >.< Anyways.. Great updates! :D Now they get to venture into the creepy asylum! YAY! Yep, this is how I want my first date to be. xD

And Avenged is, indeed, a pretty cool band. ;) She's hanging out with the guitarist, and she doesn't even know it. I wonder what Ember would say if she found out who Fenix was hanging out with. Hmm, intriguing.. Now Joh demands an update!! :D

So, now Zacky has an idea? Is that a good thing? Sorry ZV...you always have great ides :D. You're honestly making me fall in love with young Zacky, stop it JV!

I love how caring he is toward Fenix, even though he's only just met her. But he's just so sweet.

I loved when he caught her and they just looked at each other. They're so going to fall in love :D.

I can see why you liked this chapter :). I loved it.

That wasn't too cute. None of it. It was perfect. The emotions. The everything. :D I love how you call the colour of his eyes 'celadon' something different than the usual description.

Hmm Zacky is sexy when he smokes, though smoking is bad for you *naughty Zacky* lol.

There was one typo, you wrote 'him' instead of 'in' when he's goes to help Fenix up on the roof. Otherwise that was very well written :D.

OK, so sitting on top of abandoned, hospital buildings is romantic now? xD Yeah, so I kinda want to do that now.

>.> Also, stop describing things so well. You're starting to make green my favorite color.

Now the only task at hand is for me to "patiently" await an update..

Dear JV, I love you so much. xD "All things put together, he was fucking gorgeous."

Now all we need is a Gates and this story will be amazing! I kid. :3 I seriously love this. You have made me fall in love with your writing skills, and I love the way you talk about Zacky. He sounds so huggable. Like the "previous commenter" I wish to hug him too.

JV. I still love how you describe Zacky. And awww I just wanna hug him!

I really have no words :) You have a knack for writing stories like this.

"Good comment" . Hehehe :3

I love your writing style, and I love the name! OMG how much I love the name. I always suck at coming up with names. :P

I agree with Marlz; 'twas indeed a great beginning chapter! :D

Morgan Freeman is beast. xD

*ps mu was meant to be mum...>.>

JV can you give me more?

You're writing is definitely improving, I couldn't see any obvious errors :D. The prose flowed extremely well.

I really like the name you used for your main character. Fenix :D. Kinda like Felix and Phoenix combined.

I must admit I laughed when you described the Psych doc as looking like Morgan Freeman :D [He's a great actor and I also laughed when my mu swore that he'd died...>.>].

Hmmmm I wonder who that guy she ran into was...>.>.

Great beginning chapter :D

OMG, JV. I love it already. <3 Can't wait for Chapter 2.