Blood Stained Valentine - Comments

ahh this is really good! i can't wait to read more! x)

So, it's been awhile since this was updayed. I was going to comment on Nattfodd but I already did. I haven't gotten past the summary yet but I will tell you it sounds interesting. I don't know if Nikoale is an alternate spelling for Nicole or not but I still like it. As long as alternate spellings are completely unreasonable I tend to like them.

Chapter One

The first thing I noticed is the lack of space between your paragraphs. There should be an empty space between them all. Not only is it considered a proper writing format but it also makes it easier for the reader to read it. So, zombie apocalypses. Me gusta. Sad thing what happened with Ellis but at least s/he didn't have to suffer as a zombie or get killed by one if s/he was human. I used s/he because a gender isn't pointed out and I'm pretty sure it's a unisex name. Not much happened in the chapter so I can't add much more to this comment. Keith and Nikoale are sweet and I'm going to guess they would have ended up together later in the story if you continued it. That and they may have learned something new about Ellis. I did spot one spelling mistake that I listed at the bottom. Should you decide to continue with this story you should edit that real quick and add in the spaces.

The had to get to New Orleans, "the" should be "They"

You goosed me, here's your comment. =)

So you and me have something in common and I am commenting on your story XD
First off I usually don't like zombie apocalypse stuff, but this was insanely good.
In a short amount of time you really gave me a feel for the characters and Keith is definitely a sweetheart. I like how the summary was the background information it drew me in to the story before I even read it! The whole thing was very well described and the accent was well written as well.
I thought it was very good ! :)

Thank you very much! I do too, I actually have a book called 'How To Be A Zombie'. It's an awesome book. And Nikoale is actually my middle name and what I prefer to be called.

and okay, I'll go edit that. It just looked weird to me when I was writing it so that's probably why.

Him and Ellis do...hehehehe....

It's actually all explained in the next chapter, Nikoale looks back on it with Keith and they compare what happened in their home towns. (She's from New Bern, North Carolina and he's from Savannah, Georgia.)

Well in the game Ellis has an accent so I figured Keith would, too. It's not a one shot, it's a chapter by chapter thing. And thank you so much for the comment! I really appreciate it!!

Oh my god, I love zombie movies/stories and have an odd obsession with all things zombie, so I shall be thoroughly enjoying this, yes. And I like that name, Nikoale, it's unique but not too strange where I'm like say what?

Just taking a glance, you should have spaces between your paragraphs, similar to how the paragraphs in the comment are. In a book it's how you should have it, but it looks very block-y and I think it might even be a Mibba rule, but moreover it just looks more appealing.

I like how close they are, it's not really that strange considering they're pretty much off on their own and I do find it very likely that some sort of relationship would blossom. It's really cute, how she sort of cares for him, but makes me wonder what him and Ellis have, if anything at all. But I'm just a sucker for drama, aha.

I'm a little confused on how I'm immediately thrown into the story, without anything to go on at all. Usually a summary isn't used as an opener, and without it I wouldn't have known much at all. I think it would be easier to keep up if you started with something about how the zombie virus came to be, how he found Nick and then get into the story. I feel like I'm smack in the middle of the story.

His accent is cute, how you sort of put that in there. Actually, you know what? This entire thing is just freaking adorable, especially the ending. I love when relationships happen at the wrong time (like for instant, apocalypse) but they still sort of pull through, it just makes me all happy and cheery inside. I'm not sure if this is a one-shot or not, but I'm subscribing. :D

you have no idea how stupid i look with this huge grin on my face right now. But when I get comments like this it just makes me smile.

I'm going to post another chapter in Dice pretty soon. Definantly tonight.

You know, I didn't think I'd like this nearly as much as I do the Nick one...BUT OH MY GOSH KEITH IS SO SWEET.

I especially loved the last few lines. :) They're both just so adorable! I can't wait to read more, love!