I've Been Dazed and Confused - Comments

  • silk tea.

    silk tea. (400)

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    31
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    United States
    So, were I to click on this out of the blue I immediately would've clicked off. The layout is incredibly difficult to read. The pink against the red isn't flattering in the least and hurts my eyes a lot. There were punctuation errors littered throughout the story so I would recommend going through and editing. Also, the incredibly long title has unnecessary capitalizations and is also, incredibly long. Also, to someone who isn't a fan of these celebrities, no one would really have any idea what's going on. Because I sure don't. I listen to some of these people but I'm not a huge fan of them, so I honestly have zero idea what's really going on in this story. Entering a story like this in a contest, make sure the judge either knows who the person is or at least the story could be read like an original work.

    Those are my complaints.

    The writing itself is very well done. Aside from a mistake or an odd sentence here or there it's easy to read--when it's readable. I got through it quite quickly, and while confused was intrigued.
    December 8th, 2011 at 02:55am
  • LoVe Is ReAl

    LoVe Is ReAl (100)

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    United States
    Thanks!!! And to think it took me like three months to write it! :)
    June 5th, 2011 at 08:57pm
  • DarlingBacon

    DarlingBacon (155)

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    <3 Awhhh cute!!~ :D
    June 5th, 2011 at 08:50pm