Delirium - Comments

Overall, very attention-grabbing, definitely makes you want to read more. The fire in the burning air bit is a little redundant, I would suggest taking out 'burning'. Also, I'm not sure what you mean by 'concuss' at the end. Do you mean convulse?

This is amazing.
For starters, I really love the dark, twisted vibe of the whole thing. As sick as it probably sounds, I'm really into that kinda shit, haha. Also, I think the way you described this scene was brilliant. It was so incredibly vivid, so much that I actually felt like I was there, sucking in flames and watching the whole place burn it. It was just... wow. Idk, how to say it exactly, but I really enjoyed it.
Also, I like the certain vagueness so far. Brings up a lot of questions, of course, but it makes me even more excited to see what's going on here. I really can't wait 'til you next update!
I'm definitely subscribing. :)