This is a good story! The main character is easy to relate to (especially with the opinion about Luke going to war. I'm like that too, haha) and she seems sweet, so far. And Luke is a likable character, too. Your dialogue is well written, and you have a nice balance in how much detail you use. Good job. :)
There are some grammar issues, but they're not to any ridiculous extent. If you want help with that, I can do a quick look-over, but I'm not sure how much our rules differ (since I'm American). I am sure that some of those typos aren't just grammar differences, though.
I suggest you get a beta for the mistakes like; for example: wasnt is supposed to be wasn't. You're missing apostrophes, etc. The sentences were kind of choppy or missed a few words but I did like this (:
Hey guys I really cant see the grammar or spelling mistakes I've done spell check and they come back fine so can some-one mail me and tell me what mistakes I've made as I want to sort it but cant see where they are wrong xx
Comment Swap:The story idea is fantastic, I think with a little work it can be great. The grammar and spelling is an issue, perhaps more details the story flat lines in some places.
You have a few grammar and spelling errors (and not because of the British spelling, because I know British spellings) but the heart of the story is something I can relate to, and reminds me so much of my friend Andrew that you drew some tears from my eyes. Your style is flowing, and really easy to read, and it's a good love story. Keep up the good work.
The layout was good and made it pretty easy for me to read! :)
I felt as though this story was written as a diary entry, it was the type of style really. That's not a bad thing by the way, just pointing that out :) This is just a basically love story and although I've read a few before I really liked this. Probably because of your style writting.
The layout was good and made it pretty easy for me to read! :)
I felt as though this story was written as a diary entry, it was the type of style really. That's not a bad thing by the way, just pointing that out :) This is just a basically love story and although I've read a few before I really liked this. Probably because of your style writting.
I think the grammar issues you are talking about is the British spelling as I use spell check and always check it over but thanks for you comment and reading it :) xx
I like it, but it has so many spelling and grammar issues. You gotta fix that.
But other than that it's enjoyable, but the errors take me away from the story and I don't enjoy it as much, becaause I'm just more focused on the spelling n stuff. So yeh.