Untouchable - Comments

Kjkhjkhjkdsgfhhgdg. <3 This was adorable. I agree with occulta. about the dialogue- it flowed so well and you had a perfect grasp of 50's slang.

Normally, I'd feel that things moved way too fast if a girl and a boy met for the first time and ended up kissing within the span of two chapters, but you made it work so beautifully. It was really believable.

And the kiss. The kiss. It made my heart race, I'm not kidding. And that only ever happens when I read makeout scenes in Cassandra Clare's books, so that is saying something!

Brilliant, brilliant job. <3

How could I not like this, Tara? Please, tell me how. Because I find myself incapable of disliking this. ;__; Even if just a little.

The first thing I loved about this whole story is, by far, the dialogue. To be quite honest, I was just so submerged into the 50's era, it felt strange to talk afterwards without using the mannerism from that day. Not only that, but you incorporated each person's character into the story, and adapted that to the era. A hard feat, I tell you.

And now that we're on character... hot damn. Did you get any accurate, or what? ;__; G.O was just as arrogant as we could've possibly believed. I'm still shell-shocked how you accurately depicted me. It just leaves me .

My favorite scene has to be the beginning, the candy shop, and of course, the kiss.

The kiss. What is there to say about the kiss?

KAGg;AGEA ADGMA M;
;________;
WHAT YOU DID TO MY FRAIL HEART. OH GOD. THAT KISS. IT JUST. IF IT WAS JUST REAL. WAE. WAEE.

Ahem. Moving on.

Tara, I really think you did a perfect job with this. Not because it was my b-day present; let's put that aside. But in general, I truly love it. You have a way with dialogue, flowing description and character development.

♥ Just beautiful.