okay, first of all i loved the background picture, it was adorable. i loved how you included pictures of the characters and i loved that it was over 4,000 words. you did an EXCELLENT job on this one-shot and on interpreting the song. i loved how the lyrics were included so you'd know what part of the song you were talking about. i was happy that you included not just one member of BMTH, you included several if not all. as for the sex scene; MAJOR BROWNIE POINTS. there were a few simple spelling mistakes but it's okay, you're human. lol. the flashback part had me on the verge of tears, and i'm glad you included it instead of just saying, 'yeah, she's a drunk because she had a miscarriage.' you constantly kept me wondering what was going to happen next and my jaw dropped more than once. i loved how you had the whole nerdy thing with star wars and harry potter, it was adorable. but anyways, good job and good luck in the contest. :D
July 18th, 2011 at 10:53pm