Okay, well, first off: your story just starts off randomly. It needs to have some type of plot.
Secondly: it doesnt make sense and your grammar needs some help. If you need any help with that then you need to ask around the journals if some one will edit your story.
It also needs a summary, even if it some of his lyrics or her lyrics. It needs something about the story.
Okay, well, first off: your story just starts off randomly. It needs to have some type of plot.
Secondly: it doesnt make sense and your grammar needs some help. If you need any help with that then you need to ask around the journals if some one will edit your story.
It also needs a summary, even if it some of his lyrics or her lyrics. It needs something about the story.
Hope this helped!