Precision - Comments

i just found this and i love it so far! please update soon? :)

First of all, I'm not a fan of MCR at all, so I can't really say that I can differentiate between all of those people; excuse me if I put the wrong name to the wrong person >.< Anyways, you definitely have an interesting story going on here.I like Gerard's strict personality and how he likes everything the way he does and the added hint of sarcasm is very funny. Oh, and I like how you have everything medically accurate and even down to the rounds in the ER. I see a lot of hospital stories here that aren't accurate and it kind of annoys me >.> Anyways, this is brilliant! Your sentences are well put together and your grammar is amazing as well. I didn't find any mistakes at all. Great job! <3

I don't normally like premade layouts being used for stories but yours doesn't look too bad, it doesn't look terrible and you have a reasonably good grasp on grammar which makes your story look neat and tidy. :D

For the first line, when you mention the lyrics, I would suggest the next part of the sentence to be on a separate line like this:
Tik Tok on the clock but the party don't stop no whoa-oh --
A hand finds it's way out of the mess of sheets and bangs the radio alarm clock, rendering it silent. It may be Friday, but this is still way too early for Gerard's liking.
It'll be a good idea to put the lyrics in italics as well (:

But other than that, it's brilliant! Your grammar is pretty good and your sentences are nicely structured and flow with ease. I also love Gerard's sarcasm, it makes me laugh, especially when he was talking about his purse xD

Well done, good job <3

The first thing that kept me going with this is your ability to portay sarcasm the way you've done. Intentional or not, I think it's brilliant. XD

I'm intrigued to say the least and can't wait for the next bit! :D

YAY....First comment :) LOVE it by the way...I really love his personality in this...Kinda reminds me of me...lol Can't wait to read more!!!