Pink Cigarette - Comments

Wow. That was really good and I really liked it. I think you forgot to italicize the two hour one though :)

This was a great read, dear. I love anything to do with cigarettes, not really sure why, aha. Anyway, I love how well they fit into this. The burns in the sheets, in his flesh, everything. It could be taken both metaphorically or as real-life, which I also liked. I'm a sucker for stories that have room for interpretation, it makes everything so much more enjoyable. I liked the constant repetition of how much time was left for her to find him dead, it made this story more life-like & not stuck standing-still. A little repetition never hurts anything, just builds a more firm foundation with, at the same time, a movable base. Maybe the girl will come to realize that she is what she smokes, aha. Seems like a nice lesson in a very well-written piece. Great job!