Bring Me Back To You - Comments

Have I ever read anything of yours before? I don't think I have. :o
I liked this. It was cute and light, but there was also a much deeper level to it. I love stories that go through time like this, so it shows the whole life of someone instead of just a year or a month.
Helen and Joey are so adorably cute. I like that they were childhood friends. It's sweet that he's remembering Helen like this and everything, but it's also sad. I love how you set this up.
Awesome job, my little kitty. ^-^

I really loved this story! It was very well composed =)
I love your style of writing <3
I'm so in love with this! I can't wait for more!!!! <3

You have no idea how terrible I feel. ♥
I am so so sorry that I did not get
to the commenting before now. ):

I am in love with your writing. Just, everything about this.
I loved it all. The layout was perfect, the words were perfect.
I always love it when someone bases a story around an old man.
I love old men (not in a sexual way aha) because they are
almost always very interesting. This was very sad to read,
but very beautiful. It is very calm, and not too dramatic.
And I found that really awesome because I rarely see that in stories.
You have a way with words. Really, you do. Lovely lovely lovely all the way through.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

This story is so ...calm? Everything about it is just so serene, quiet and beautiful. I love how you write; your flow is so fluid, everything just pieces together. & you make me want to know more about helen, joey and their story, like they have a great story to share. He's on the brink of death but I feel like he's immersing myself into a time far from the present. Waah I don't know what I'm saying. But I know that I really, really want to continue reading this. :]

I am in love with this story. It is super cute but kinda sad at the same time. It is cute because as he is dying, Joey is still thinking about Helen, the one he loves. And it’s sad because well, he is dying. I love the short chapters because it’s a short but beautiful glimpse into his life and into his memories.

And I just want to say that I completely love the layout. It is so pretty. Lastly, I like how this story’s main character is an old man. I don’t normally see stories where the main character isn’t a teenager. So I think this idea is splendid. Anyway, I love this story and I am definitely subscribing to this story!

This story reminds me of the book I read, Water for Elephants. Have you ever read that book? It's an amazing book.

The layout is pretty cute to me, I don't generally have a like or dislike for it. It's not distracting from me reading, so it's pretty alright and approved. I don't like layouts that distract from the stories, like those bright obnoxious colors. Just, ugh.

The tone of the story, all together, your writing, seems pretty sarcastic, in my opinion. This is seemingly a sweet story in the beginning or it seems like it's going to be, and then... the descriptions are so sarcastic, it kinda makes me cock my head to the side and have to re-read what you just said. Especially when you described his picture that was just recently destroyed.

I was like: "...uh-huh." And went back to reading after pausing for a few moments.

I don't know if this is good. As, it's only three chapters, and I don't know if that is a good tone to have with this story, or not. Hopefully it does, because your tone could do wonders for a story depending on where it goes and what it's about.

The story has potential, for sure. I won't lie about that. But death and me are having issues at the moment, so I don't know if I could continue with the story or read more of it. Death gives me bad anxiety for some odd reason. I guess I fear it. I constantly think about it. So the story hit me emotionally. I don't know if that's good or bad for you?

Continue with it, it's going great. Just, the only real complaint I have about it is how you tell everything in one paragraph. There's little to no mystery about the characters and that can be slightly disappointing, but don't worry. It might work with your tone of writing.

You never know. So good luck and happy writings.

one other thing, joey and helen sorta remind me of ellie and mr fredickson from Up wen they were kids

I like this story a lot so far
one thing is that in the first paragraph of chapter 2 you meant to say he remembered but you said and her remembered so just fix that i didnt see anyhting else
good story cant wait for more

Oh, and sorry this is late... I had a lot going on this week and yeah... My bad.

This was gret! I really liked the way you described death with human traits. The personificafion was amazing.
95 years old... That's a heck of a long life! :D
This story is very good. I enjoyed every second of it. I liked the part of the flashback when the old man presents the love of his life and it lets us know how they first met.
You have a great writing style, mah friend!

Oh my goodness I love this!

The idea is very good, and a very emotional subject. You've written it beautifully and I got hooked in the first chapter. It made me sad that there were only two chapters so far. But good things come to those who wait, right? And I can already tell that this is a good thing.

Banner/Layout
I love the cloudy lay out and banner. It makes me feel like I’m in the sky.

Summary:
The summary is simple and doesn’t give anything away without turning the reader away. I like it.

chapter one
This story seems vaguely familiar. Just the plot line that way, anyways, on to the true comment. Lol.

I like how Old Man Atkins isn’t scared of death. It makes me wonder what’s in store for him.

Despite this chapter being short, I believe you did a wonderful job with making this an introductory chapter. :) Old Man Atkin’s is an admirable man.

Chapter Two
Aww, the way you described Joey and the little girl gave me a cute little picture of two little kids who will be best of friends and eventually become child hood sweethearts. Yes, this chapter is making me melt with mushiness. It’s so cute. I love little kids.

Helen is a bit intimdating but she seems like the perfect match for shy sweet Joey. Lol.

I really enjoyed the story and I hope to read more soon. I will definitely sub. :)

First off I really like the layout :)

The summary was kind of short but at the same time it drew me in, it didn't give alot away.

I like the way you made him not afraid of death even though its haunting him, waiting to take over, his not afraid. Most people would be afraid and I like how you didn't make him afraid. That his ready for it.

I can tell this is going to be a really good story, can't wait to read more :)

I love the layout, it's simple and serene and sets the mood for the story. First off, I love the name Old Man Atkins. It has a nice ring to it and makes me want to read it over and over. The summary was also very appealing.

Like border collie said, I love how you personified death. You made him feel like he lurks around every corner, just waiting to take us away. I like that you talked about how death was taunting him when everyone else he knew died, I think that's what drew me in. You have a great style of writing, it is very clean cut.

I'm very curious as to where this goes because in your summary you said he fears thinking about her. I am definitely going to subscribe but post on my comments when you update!

I like this.
I really enjoyed how you personified death, when you said that death could, in simpler words, strangle you at any moment.
I really felt for Old Man Atkins. It must be terrible to see the people around you dying,
but it seemed to be a blessing in disguise because he could have a blissful death.

This really is a great start to a very interesting sounding story.
It's hard to create drabble length chapters and still have them make sense, but you pull it off.
I really hope you continue this, the plot is original and you're a very good writer <3

I only found one tiny mistake: Where it says, "And now, he supposed, death was coming for him to." The last word should be "too", not "to." And it's not necessary, but you might want to put a comma in front the last word, so that it reads, "And now, he supposed, death was coming for him, too."